Just enjoy the show

A Thousand Years

2012-01-20T04:24:00.000-08:00

Hey guys! Its been like what, the 3rd week of school and honestly, school has drained me to the core. I come home late everyday and barely can have a proper hour's nap. Somedays, if I'm lucky I manage to catch a 30 minute nap. Even then, I will find it not enough. Even with a 7 hour sleep, I will still be tired. Mentally.

So stressful to be a sec 4. Teachers reminding us on how N's are in 7-8 months away. And we've not much time as we presume. I am so scared right now. I don't want to be one of those who studies so hard but in the end fail and retain. Y'know the feeling just sucks right. Cause it has been happening to me. I can only find time to be on the computer during the weekends, holidays or a Friday.

My life basically now is homework and revision. To top it off, cca proposals. The last of it thank goodness. If not, I can never survive. Le sigh

Today we had CNY celebrations. It was pretty ok. Liked all the performances esp Indian Dance cause of the song Chamak Challo. Really nice song :-) Went out to tpy kfc with Faal and Muna. And we saw Lim King Khing. BAHAHAHA that guy has not changed one bit.

I really love the image stability and colour of Canon. And without adjusting much. Nikon is really troublesome in a way cause you've to adjust the setting and proper lighting and stuff. I guess I gotta learn how to use my Nikon and take photos that will stand out. Probably gonna use the holidays to go out to the park and just snap photos.

So ok, HAPPY CNY MY FRIENDS :-) xx

#1

2012-01-06T19:19:00.000-08:00

Hey its been the 7th day of 2012. And so far this whole week, I've been so busy and tired. Busy with sec one orientation + make up camps. Tired from it too.Next week its back to reality. Test on Tuesday ugh balance day adjustments. My life -_- I hope everything will go smoothly.

And during the sec 1 orientation camp, kaitlin brought her canon dslr to take pictures. Hell, I love it. When I used it, the colour and image stability was so good. I was tempted to just buy it le sigh. Just gotta stick to my D90 and be happy.

Happy New Years

2011-12-31T20:27:00.000-08:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYBODY!!!!! I hope 2012 will be a great year for all of you. Remember to always stay happy and positive! :-)

Singtel crashed last night cause everyone was tweeting/texting each other Happy New Year. Hahahahahaha it took me so long before I received texts. I spend my NYE with an idiot watching the countdown in my room. Honestly, Nat Ho sound super autotuned. And These Kids Wear Crowns weren't so bad.

I really dislike you and you ok. Gosh you have a problem with everything everyone does. Its annoying how you comment on everything. If I really can tell you how you're such a motherfucking attention seeking whore, oh honey I would. Its sad how some people's attitudes have became asdfghjkl :-( You guys used to be so nice but now you've changed so much le sigh life goes on xx

P R A Y

2011-12-29T20:34:00.000-08:00

Hi everybody!!! 2011 is going to end in 2 days. 2 DAMN DAYS omg that's so fast. To me, I think 2011 has been such a good + bad year for me. Bad because I lost a few people in my life that I thought I won't lose but hey that's ok I found new friends and thanks to them, I am a happier person now who probably does stupid stuff and laugh at myself all the time (yes, I had a 10 minute laughing fit laughing about myself)

But y'know, if we constantly choose to be sad over things that we know are not gonna change no matter how much we want to, we're gonna lose out in life. There're so much things out there we can do. Like how Louis Tomlinson said, "Live life for the moment because everything else is uncertain." And right now that is the quote I'm living to together with "Never say never" - Justin Bieber. I learn to be a more positive person this year. And I'm glad I did. Cause right now, out there, there are so many people who are suffering way worse than me.

Anyway, I am gonna do dedications like I always do for New Year's and post MY RESOLUTIONS TOO this year I hope I stick to it!!!

Durah: Hey Lurbly!!! I've known you since sec 1 and we sat beside each other during Malay until Yeti chose to shift me to the front due to my horrible malay grades. And throughout the 2 years that I sat beside you, we weren't really close and all we did was well, gossip about Yeti and other teachers HAHAHA now in sec 3 we've gotten quite close eversince Surabaya and you sitting behind me with Faaliha. I miss Math Club :-( I hope we will still sit near each other next year, and we must persevere and work hard ok!!! Let's continue laughing at each other and telling each other shit stories. OK I LOVE U DARLING BYE :-*

Faaliha: Hi gurl!!! Its crazy how I've known you for only a year and we've grown so close. I thank class and the days where we stayed back to wait for etch to start -_- And we spend our time talking about BFFL hahaha omg so funny. Your quotes ~~~inspire~~~ me hehehe "There will always be a better tomorrow" Right? Sigh you so wise like an owl and also like me ;-) Its cool how we always help each other in cca shit. We always bitch about the teachers omg I don't think I can remember what bitching we do. Its like all the time hahaha. You're really a very approachable person, I can talk to you about almost anything, grateful :'-) hehehe next year we shall push each other to work hard and hopefully 1D concert to meet Zayn our husband ;-) OK I LOVE YOU DEAREST SPEEDO bye :-*

Muna: Hi gurl!!! Omg you're the blur-est person I've met. So sotong la you! But at the same time funny + lame. Please pick up some funny skills from someone. I don't know how you do it but sometimes, you are always happy eventhough your life may not be so cheerful...I'm proud of u! Stay strong girl :-) Please, find a cure for your hypersomnia(?) Its N's next year, very important year!!! Don't fall asleep in class ok. If you sit beside me and you sleep, I will slap your face hard and probably poor water on you to wake you up hehehehehehehe I'm so evil lol ok LET'S WORK HARD NEXT YEAR and achieve good results now cheer up alright ok I LOVE YOU LAAMO (I forgot your nickname for a moment) bye :-*

Dharshana: Hi Pantatsharam!!! I've only gotten to know you properly thanks to Yuhui and we are already so close. Gosh I pretty much talk to you about almost anything. Well, considering how you talk alot whenever we go home HAHAHA I like how you always work so hard for your exams and you should continue doing that. You will do well for O's, trust me :-) God is fair. I have fun with you all the time. And with Vanessa + Claudi too. We go back home and lepak at Bartley buy cupwalker at Paya Lebar. We can do that after exams next year or whenever we go back together. Continue working hard indian buddy :D Ok I LOVE YOU PANTAT bye :-*

Carina: Hi Chowder!!! Its crazy how I got to know you for at least over a year now. And we've grown so close, you are one of the friends I can trust with my problems and how you will always try to help me with your ~coolness~ hahaha Thanks so much for everything girly ;-) We should hurry go make the Indian Buddy + Forever Alone shirt soon! You must continue to work hard ok. I will help you out and give some wise advice. From the wise owl itself lol I hope our friendship will last till after we graduate ok I LOVE YOU CHOWDER bye :-*

Christine: Hi Bob!!! I've known you for a year and we are already quite close. Wow that's really amazing cause I've only you known since ndp training cause we planned to go together lololol and since then you've told me about your ~troubles~ that I am still trying to help you with. Its hard y'know cause I don't have first hand experience and here I am trying to help you. Hahaha you are both retarded and nice. I can't stand how you can be so annoying at times that I want to smack you but I still help you. Call me Mr Nice guy. Le sigh I hope things do work out for you and you do well in your studies. So ok I LOVE YOU BOB bye :-*

Sammy: Hi Cupid!!! Gosh you retarded girl, sick I might add. I can't tahan your sickness sometimes. I am wondering where do you learn all this sick shit. Sammy, you gotta control yourself ok. Later guys will find it hard to be with you ;-) We've grown quite close over a year. Hanging out in class with David and Renata and NMCA in short talking shit. So funny how we want to put people together but fail in the end because we can't find people to trust. And I like how we dislike some people and find whatever they do irritating lololol especially Queen Bee. Omg she sux la. Ok anyway I hope we will do well for N's and a good campfire :-D Ok I LOVE YOU CUPID bye :-*

PLC: Hi guys!!! Omg you bunch of crazy retards I've known for 3 years. I cannot even tell you guys how much I love you. Its like we do all sorts of shit together like going to tpy and get koi and lepak at McD's afterwards without even getting anything there. We are so united I can't stand it lololol the bond never dies. I hope we would have a smashing campfire next year. Haunted house :-D Omg excitezzzz at the same time how we've not planned yet. Hopefully, it won't be too last minute and stuff. I will miss you guys when you graduate!!! le sigh ok I LOVE YOU GUYS bye :-*

NMCA: The craziest bunch of Math Clubbers in class :-D Gosh we became so close during Racial Harmony Day. Spamming my camera + dancing like shit!!! Never had I had so much fun. You guys make me laugh like shit and how we always bully beandemort and sing randomly in class le sigh I hope we are sitting close to each other next year so we can work hard while doing shit in class. ok I LOVE YOU GUYS bye :-*

And that concludes my dedication post hehehe. Oh and this year I love a certain band called ONE DIRECTION.

Found out about them since wmyb. Since I don't watch X Factor. And yes I used to only like their songs cause well, I sing like a retard in class with my friends. And than, I learn who is who. And Zayn was the hottest amongst them ^^ Soon, I went to stalk them on Youtube. Their performances were awesome!!!! And I watched their Video Diaries with my sissy and since then, she had became a fan in 10 minutes. The power lololol she likes Louis the most as he is so bloody retarded. Hilarious people hahahahaha anyway I ship them and yes I live by the quote Louis created.

(Source: amazaynlove)

Ok this post is extremely loooooooooooong never have I posted such a long post. I wanna post pictures on my trip hehehe. Its such a culture shock for real. Time difference is 5 hours behind so right now, I'm still adjusting my body clock. At night I find it hard to sleep. Ystd alone I slept at 11 woke up at 1230 and 5 1/2 hours later I slept back (y) So for the past few days I had only 5 hours of sleep le sigh

City Lights

Spices (flowers)

Christmas Deco (the christmas spirit there is -1000)

Cupcakes from Red Velvet

School in 4 days omg no thanks and I have to be in school by 645 on the first day, well goodluck to myself omg crazy people.

My New Year's resolution:

Get good results throughout the year
9 points for N's (hopefully I can make it)
Stay happy always
Save $$$ for my own shopping + 1D concert
Be more discipline in terms of leisure time hehehe

Ok this is the end of my long post, so I wish every a HAPPY NEW YEAR'S!!! :-)

Single.

2011-12-19T05:35:00.000-08:00

I am starting to like living here. Honestly, I would consider living here if I can but if that ever happens, my tolerance level for the people here has to be high. Doubt my parents will actually want to migrate here. Cause education is expensive here and the company doesn't cover all children. Only 2 le sigh

But I won't abandon my friends. Yes, I'm talking about indian buddies, mamas, WT gang, Cupids, PLC and ok my friends end of story. My dad did once tell me, if I were to stay here, I won't stop going to concerts. Yes if 1D comes I will go for sure :)

Liam did an interview on 913. Hell it was sexy but damn funny. He couldn't understand what the 10 directioners were saying lololol. Here's the interview http://onedirection-slo.tumblr.com/post/14262160965/liams-interview-on-the-singaporean-radio-station

AND THEY'RE COMING MID OF NEXT YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am definitely going. Going to save $$$ and do well for everything and make sure my mom allows me to go yes ok bye

2011-12-12T05:48:00.000-08:00

GREETINGS FROM DOHA:):)

Its like the 12th day of my holiday, and yes its been good though some parts are just lousy and boring...but anyway, I want to do a lot of things but the thing is, its quite cold. There are like killer winds and not so convenient for me to walk around. I wake up around 11am everyday, Doha time and that's like about afternoon time in sg. Gonna be so screwed when I come back cause a day after I've Adam Khoo to attend le sigh anyway bye

-

2011-11-29T23:28:00.000-08:00

Did some baking and watched Paranormal Activity 3 with my lurbly mbaks :) :) Hehehe I had so much fun!!! PA3 was scary for me.....didn't watch 98% of it. Coward yes I know.

I'm leaving tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sooooooooooooo excited hehehe. And yes I'm not done packing, pro (y)

Wishing On A Star

2011-11-27T21:08:00.000-08:00

For the past few days, I've been thinking a lot lately about my life and my future. I think of myself as a simplistic kind of person. I don't need to pepper myself much with fancy stuff. Even if I do have the desire and want quite often, I rather stay content with what I've. I'm actually blessed with what I've like the friends, family and anything I own. There are so many more people out there that are suffering much worse than me. So I shouldn't complain and wallow myself in self-pity. That's just pathetic.

I want to be a counseller, I don't know why but I just want to. I want to love my job in the future and not hate it and end up in some dead end job. I want to live by myself in an apartment and just get back home and relax and not to think of anything. I WANT THAT KIND OF CARE-FREE LIFE. I want to migrate. Maybe to America or Australia? I think Australia isn't a bad place to migrate to. The people there are so friendly and relax.

3 days more to my trip omg its nearing and I don't know why but not that excited anymore? Or I never was. WHY WHY WHY damn I hate this feeling. But I want to meet my dad that's for sure.

3 people coming to my house tomorrow to bake hehehe :) :)

I can love you more than this

2011-11-23T23:49:00.000-08:00

HARRY: So I went online and had a look at what people were saying about me.
NIALL: The stuff that people were saying about him was just disgusting and no one wants to go and read that stuff about themselves. No matter who they are.
LOUIS: It’s quite frustrating when I tried to comfort him after the performance, nothing I could say could really make that much of a difference. I felt a bit paralyzed, like I really wanna do something for a friend but I couldn’t.

Just finished watching their documentary!!! Honestly, its damn good. I kinda didn't know that they'd that side of them. Poor Harry. Yes I feel the same way as you :)

Just wishing to be a person that not to care about what people say about me, honestly I'm not one of those people. I pretend not to care but I do. But I can't let it bring me down, I guess. All I ever do is give and take whatever but whatever I'm truly feeling, stays inside of me.

WHY AM I SO NICE TO YA after what happened. I guess I'm just too nice for my own good....I'm glad to help but I don't feel like being a part of your life anymore. I want to be out of it. Stay far away from you.

WHY AM I SO HAPPY TODAY right after tuition, I felt damn care-free. Something's wrong with me for sure hahahahahahahahaaha

After reading/watching the many movies/stories, I want a guy bestfriend. They seem to be more understanding, knows how to make you laugh/smile, care-free idiot and non-judging. Usually always there for you. But sadly those guys aren't easy to find, not in Asia :/ May I've a guy bestfriend who can allow me to forget all my worries all the time?

ok about a week left now bb

-

2011-11-20T21:22:00.000-08:00

How can you not like this boys? They're dreamy as heck. I dreamt of shampoo-ing Niall's hair like da crap bro u srs?! When I woke up it felt really weird but Niall's face in my dream was really dreamy oh lol hahahaha their album is just (y) Listened to it everyday #likeaboss I hope they do come to sg! Ok stop fan girling lul

Anyway its like 9-10 days before I leave!!!!! omg excitezz FINALLY OUT OF THIS COUNTRY hehehe. And guess what I've not even finished half of my packing. I am da best! Mom's too busy + there're so many other things we've to bring. And I can only pack if my mom tells me exactly what to bring. Yes I can be that dependent on my mom.

I still have english homework to do. Oh wait that's my only homework HAHAHAHA I don't want to do it omg :< Nvm tomorrow I shall go to the library and do. And I don't have to bring it over cause obviously I won't do it. But I still have to revise for next year N's. I start early for revision and probably can ace it and get into the foundation program in poly :)

I'm addicted to Wattpad omg. The stories there are really nice, makes me wish that I've such a life lol. Ok stop dreaming you idiot

2011-11-16T20:33:00.001-08:00

Harry no Styles hahahahahahah

Back from Batammmmmmmmmmmmmmm :) It was fun!!! I'd so much fun laughing and partying with dharsh, curry, grass, aff, rachel, nut, leah and Alex. All the #burn/#burnt jokes are just hahahahahahahhaahaha and the dares + partying we did were just nuts. I really miss it ok! Now I'm back to damn reality, ugh its so boring

This weekend I've to pack my luggage for my December trip. Nuuuuuuu I'm too lazy :/ I'll probably end up procrastinating till the last minute. So many things to bring oh damn

Reached sg at about 7 last night, had dinner and went home. Came home having a sorethroat. During the trip, my voice was almost gone hahahah and I didn't really talk much on the second day we went to the school and drank loads of water, so that saved my throat. But what I didn't do was watch what I ate despite the throat. Ystd for lunch we were served like dishes with chilli padi, and I LOVED IT. I just ate like nobody's business. Didn't really care about the throat part. Kangkong was delicious ^^ Spent all my money there on those friendship bands. It was really nice ok

Back to school tomorrow for dry run ugh. I hate it ok anyway bb

2011-11-10T18:28:00.000-08:00

11/11/11. Whats so great about it, really? I just find it any other ordinary day except that the day, month and year are the same. Nothing special. Don't get why people wants to make a wish at 11:11:11 am on 11/11/11. No sense don't you think? You spend it with your special someone while you know what I'm going to spend on, wishing for more food. HAHAHAHA my idea of 11/11/11. Nothing great about it really. Its just plain bullshit if you asked me.

All I want is to be wanted and loved by someone special, is that too much to ask for?

Batam in 2 days. You know something, I've not pack much. All I did was bought 1kg of pandan leaves, dump my clothes inside. And thats all. I'm too much of a pig to pack. If you're willing to pack for me, please tell me hahahahahaha

After I come back from Batam, just 2 weeks more till my 1 month trip. I FEEL SO HAPPY :-D On the other hand, spend ystd watching 1D videos with my sissy. In 10 minutes, she became a fan. Probably cause Louis Tomlinson is such a clown like her. My sissy and I can laugh so hard at him. He's such a nut.

Hope they come to Singapore~~~~ ok bb

Take a look at me now

2011-11-09T21:59:00.000-08:00

GOTTA BE YOU OFFICIAL MUSIC VIDEO hahahahahaha Zayn just looks goddamn sexy!!!!! I melt everytime he sings to the girl~~~~

Its 3 days to my Batam trip, guess what? I've not started packing at all. How pro am I :) I'm damn excited. Gonna party with my buddies :D And after I'm back, it'll be going to school for S1 orientation dry run + sasm outing + I don't know what before my 1 month holiday with my dad in Dubai/Doha. I can't wait to get there cause 1) I WANT TO SHOP 2) SPEND TIME WITH MY DAD 3) Get away from Singapore

-

2011-10-20T00:44:00.000-07:00

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY DHARSHANA <3

Went out with ma homies yesterday to celebrate Faaliha's birthday in advance! Damn fun siol~~~ We went for seoul first. I almost fell down while climbing the steps (n) Had a lot of fun + laughter at seoul, H&M, Zara, Smiggle, in the rain and Icing Room. Made a birthday cake for her ^^ Hehehe

Today. Was such a sad day for a lot of people. A lot of them got called out to see the principle cause they might retain but they've to go through study camp first to prove themselves. I really hope everyone would take it positive ok! You guys can pull it through ;-)

Forever Young

2011-10-13T01:00:00.000-07:00

"No I will not leave them because they made a stupid mistake. You make mistakes, I make mistakes, everyone makes mistakes. So don’t tell me to leave someone because it’s my decision on who I’ll leave & who I’ll stay with."

Hi. My day has been rather productive I guess. Packed my room, it was such a mess. Sorted out through my letters from sec one. And I must say I miss everyone that used to be so important in my life. Is it my fault that they're no longer there? Or is it theirs? I can't put the blame on anyone. We all once have those people, but they'll leave sooner or later. Just wish I can keep them with me forever. I just wish. But life's unfair, we just have to move on. If they're happy without me, I'm fine.

On the other hand, I'm gonna wash the car later with my sissy and maybe do a little research on Dubai + Doha. Seriously can't wait to go visit my dad! ;-) And there's a girl who has been screaming for like 15 minutes straight....it sounds like she's getting raped. Sigh, I've been waiting forever for himym s1 + gg s01e05 to download since like ystd. Its not even halfway done. Now, I downloaded waiting for forever. Its seems like a nice show! 2 hours for WFF to finish. A gaziliion years for himym + gg to finish.

What makes you beautiful

2011-10-12T04:36:00.000-07:00

Hi. Its been long since I've last blogged. And since now exams are finally over! I will make a point to blog hehehe life's been good :-) Laugh like shit everyday with ma homies. I'm gonna be on a himym, probably gg and movie marathon whoop whoop

"The lesser you care, the happier you will be." this is actually true. Still remembered on how I cared a lot last year over everything. And most of the times I don't have to care but I do. And this year I decided to be a better person for myself. I decided to care less, and true that I became happier. Why should we care about something trivial when we can be happy? My phone wallpaper reminds me to smile all the time. And I will. We shouldn't be sad all the time, be happy! Its not that bad ;-)

WE LUV LEMONS

2011-08-21T00:30:00.000-07:00

Went on the circle line emergency exercise thing on Saturday. My goodness it was super epic. When it bom, everyone screamed and philly sat on the chair laughing/hyperventilating omg. HAHAHAHAHAH and after that was a buffet. So everyone ate. And there was lemon, so, cheryl went to eat it thinking it was nice. But it became really sour in the end. Damn epic I swear. HAHAHHAAHAHA

2011-08-12T22:18:00.000-07:00

Now you're gone

2011-06-27T08:07:00.001-07:00

Fuck this shit. I am feeling down as fuck. I feel so fucking hated. I feel that i'm look down upon. I feel so cheated. Don't take jt to heart but right not i could possibly hate everyone. OK bb.

It only happens once in a lifetime

2011-06-24T08:14:00.001-07:00

Holidays are gna end in 2 days :-( It has been a hectic/productive month. Had camp + surabaya exchange + mlp. OK I M LAZY TO UPDATE. Shall update proper post with pictures soon ;-)

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I wish you'd be the one for me

2011-06-09T07:35:00.001-07:00

Holidays has been srsly draggy :-( i do the same thing everyday. I should've went out. Regretting so much now.....surabaya this sunday till thursday. Going out with my family on friday after i return. Monday to thursday, media literacy shit. Saturday, photography course. Oh dear god. I only had one week's rest throughout the whole holiday kill me. Ok i am dying of boredom. Bb.

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Faking smiles

2011-06-06T00:51:00.000-07:00

Hey. Second week of the holidays. I would probably say nothing much has happened. Except that i just had camp and i most probably have gained weight. I MUST LOSE. Ultimate goal this holiday!!!!! Should stop being such a pig >( Been tumblr-ing, eating, talking, laughing, drinking, tweeting, spazzing, shufflin'. Lololol what i do everyday! Hahaha. Surabaya in less than a week. Omg hope my bunk buddy would be someone i'm close to. If not, 5 days of awkwardness omg >:/ Saw Alam at E!Hub today hahahahahaha bitch.

WE ALL HAVE A FRIEND WHO

LOVES TO EAT..

LOVES TO LAUGH..

IS FAKE TO US OR HATE SECRETLY US..

LOVES TO SLEEP..

LOVES TO DANCE..

ALWAYS MAKES FUN TO LIKE, EVERYTHING..

DONT CARES IF HE/SHE HAS OR AINT HAVE HATERS..

IS SO INSECURE..

IS ALWAYS MAD..

ALWAYS SAD..

WHO ALWAYS CRY..

ALWAYS ANNOYS HIS/HER HAIR..

ALWAYS SAYS “HI/HELLO/HEY/YOW” AND ETC TO YOU..

LOVES TO SHOUT..

DOESNT BELIEVE TO LIKE, EVERYTHING..

HATES TO SMILE..

ALWAYS SUPPORTS OR AGREE’S WITH YOU..

IS KINDA SHY..

AND.. MORE!

Jetlag

2011-05-30T23:04:00.000-07:00

Its the fourth day of the holidays? Honestly, it feels like a week have past by already. Last Thursday was parents teacher meeting. When i looked at my report book, i felt so damn demoralized. But my parents didn't scold me at all. And they said they can see that i have put in a lot of effort for this term's exams. I can say that PTM went well. Ms Ho and Ms Chua so nice + my parents :') I feel so #blessed, really. I srsly got to work harder next time and do even better. Whatever shit that comes my way, i cannot let it affect me.

Camp's tomorrow and i am very excited :-) But i've oral before that. Omg can die. Guuuud luck to me ~

I don't like you. Die bitch. But its also thanks to you, i have to be somewhere else. Stop dominating the place. For your information, no one likes you. Its funny how no one took you in the other day. Maybe you should stop being a bitch for once, people can change their perspective of you. #justsayin

Rain go away,

2011-05-24T07:29:00.001-07:00

Hello. I got back my results. Well at least for English, Elect geog, Physics and SS. Eng and geog was quite ok :-) Physics literally made me this close to crying when Mr Chua was going through the paper. SS i really got nothing to say. Today, i went for a course at Bradell. Boring :-/ Asked Durah about malay. And she told me Hajjar wants to see my parents. I was like damn shock. Like i did something wrong. Than i somehow got answers here and there why she want to see my parents. Sry, but i don't feel good about this. O well. I hope my Chem, E math and POA are gud news ~~~ sigh yknow what i hate most. Studying so hard but my efforts going down the drain. I hate disappointing my parents. I am so dumb. Can nvr make myself or my parents proud. Stupid me. I am so damn annoyed and sad. I srsly want to vent all of this somewhere. But idk where. Bb.

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Come home to me

2011-05-20T05:28:00.000-07:00

Hello. Results are nearing :-( And i am really scared. I studied hard for it, so i really hope it gets paid off. Sigh hahahaha Leadership training yesterday. It was quite ok but still boring. Been too to many, i guess i get tired. Hahah the caterpillar and balloon game was quite funny :p Heheh next week Monday-Thursday leadership training/workshops :-( My life super cool ah.

I srsly am very bored that i feel like studying.

Ok bye.

Here we go again.

2011-05-18T07:35:00.001-07:00

Hello!! :-) Its been a while blogger its been a while. Now, exams are over. I tried and put in my best. Stayed up to study till 2. Psycho-ed my mind with all the information. I really gave my all. I just hope it gets paid off. If not, i'll really cry. Something i work hard for, and it didn't get paid off. I hope it doesn't happen.

My parents better not screw me if there's failures. I TRIED MY BEST. If i were to ever tell you what happen to me during the exam period, you should feel proud. Actually all parents should know that when it comes to exams, your child will actually stay up to burn the midnight oil mugging. Should feel #blessed i'm #justsayin

So my fifteenth was yesterday. Celebrate it with 4 lovely nublets <3 Who are crazy and fun people!!!!! Koi ftw ~~ School was so damn boring today........except camp follow up. Loved that!!! :D Sec 3 camp trainers are back :') Missed them. I miss camp!!! Don't mind going for another camp :-) Safety talk was the worse. Sat there for like 1-2 hours...? Listening to officers talk about safety. I am not stupid i learn road safety before. I was like half asleep haha. Couldn't keep my eyes open ~~

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KIMBERLEY LIM :-) <3

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2011-04-27T07:46:00.001-07:00

I'm not gna touch blogger till 12 May #justsayin
OK BYE.

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Justin Bieber.

2011-04-23T07:37:00.001-07:00

Just like my title. Gna be talking about that guy in this post. I've not blogged for the longest time. Been having post depression from Justin's concert. I didn't go but i got ear fucked by him thanks to Carina <3 He sounded so hot on the phone.

Saw pix and videos of him!!! So hot. Even my wallpaper is him. Hot to the maximum <3 After watching Never Say Never yesterday, my mind is filled with him 24/7. Regret not going for his concert. Argh >( Hope legaci (Justin's crew) comes back to SG like they said. And bring Justin along with him!!!! So cool to have his whole crew loving Singapore so much and that they didn't want to leave singapore so much. Hahah the new paper is so damn bad. They made things worser than it already was. I guess Justin was pissed when TNP said he snubbed his fans off. And + he was sick + jetlag + his dog's death and selena wasn't there. It made things X10000 worse. O well. I'm glad he is enjoying himself elsewhere.

I must watch NSN again and meet Justin Bieber!!!! He is too oshdkssksnsbaksk. You just need to meet him. Argh i can cry :'(

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All time low;

2011-04-08T08:01:00.001-07:00

Sports carnivaaaaaaaaaaaaal was today!!!! It was F U N i admit. But it got everybody too tired to cheer at the end of the day. Hahaha

I played archery. Like so easy when i played eh!!!!! 10x easier from last year. Hahahahhaha i still remember the person scolded me last year cause i do wrong. Lol. What a life. Spend the whole time with Sweetha & Stacia!!!!! :-) So funny how we sat at a corner and wondering why no one sat there and we found out its cause the floor makes your butt white. And we wanted to wet our butts to wash it off and tell people we played water soccer. Omg epic :p

Tolley is the winner overall. Congratz :-) They made history hahahahahahah after many years. And fearon is last and it was damn shocking but who cares. Its just an event and not your life :-)

Congratz to the SMSB, Indian dance, drama, Modern Dance for getting gold with honours and silver :-) You did St margs proud yo ^^ Hahahahahahahahah

Bye.

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Born to be somebody;

2011-04-02T08:21:00.001-07:00

Neglecting my blog. Hahahahahahah i keep telling myself to blog but i know i'm just so damn boody lazy. So forget it. Hahahaha

I wouldn't say life's been pretty alright but its ok i guess. Hahaha exam's in 3 weeks oh crap :-( So damn scared. Interview this Tuesday. Worser!!!!! I scared i stumble on my words and such than like ayo cannot imagine. Hahahah

I hope what my parents asked me to imagine or my opinion is not true. If it is i will cry......not like i already want to.

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I guess I was wrong;

2011-03-27T05:52:00.000-07:00

Life's been ajdsoahdoajbdkjadbkadjah annoying. O well :-) I love love geog and POA like crazy nowwwwwwww!!! But i still hate physics :-/

I need help somebody please? Goal: To mug and aim for better grades in my studies :-) I hope to achieve it somehow. Now, my partner is Hannah David. I will not get distracted so I shall concentrate from where i'm sitting. Kinda miss my old seat. Hahahahahah ~~~ Friday was kinda of a slacked. OMG pe was bloody gross. I can't believe Mdm Fong thought of such a gross way to improve our sit and reach? Its called the human touch. Hahahahah omg damn gross. My whole class was like laughing their ass off. I literally laughed till I cried omg :-p

Guides was surprisingly kinda slack. Hahahhahahah decided to sing Marry you for campfire :-) Hopefully successful ~

Friday wasn't such a good day. Hahah found out things that I guess i shouldn't even be knowing of. Well, it sucks. But i can't really do much. What puts me off is actually how you lied to me all this time and played with my feelings. I guess i was wrong to think in any way. I just am tired of you and all this fucking shit.

Wish you were here;

2011-03-26T07:56:00.001-07:00

I fucking hate you, bitch.

I'm a human being with feelings. So its wrong for me to act differently whether in school or home? Thats ridiculous. You're stupid and judgemental. Ask me stupid questions on my formspring. I'm tired from all of this. I don't need you to ask me stupid questions. Ugh wtf.

Play with my life, you die.

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Expect the unexpected

2011-03-14T06:06:00.000-07:00

Currently am looking through photography courses to take up with my indian buddies for my NYAA. Hahahha efficient right :-) O well hopefully to find something suitable for my age and my schedule ~~~

Showed my dad my CTs and MRTs. Surprisingly he didn't scream or yell at me. He said I just have to ask people if I ain't sure. Yup I will ~ Omg damn motivated sia. Today it was quite productive. Did housework and than studied and than out with my family to rewind. Omg if I do this like everyday I think I'd like not have a boring holiday. Happykid :-)

Omg LIT training tomorrow......its such a drag. I wish I could just skip it lah. I think Wednesday would be fun. Cleaning guides room with dearest pses. Omg gna be fun as hell ^^ I hope to discover many many things while cleaning it. Hopefully ah ~

JB on Friday to Sunday? Hahah omg I kinda miss Malaysia. More like KL. I forgotten when was the last time I've been there. ~memories~

It was quite unexpected.

Say it on the radio

2011-03-12T06:55:00.001-08:00

What has the world turn into?

Japan and other countries having earthquakes and tsunamis. Omg scary. Especially for Japan. 1700 lives are gone thanks to this natural disasters. #prayforjapan I thank god Singapore has no natural disasters cause we're protected by our neighbouring countries. I thank god. Let's just pray for the world.

Term 1 has come to a closure. Friday was one of the worse days ever. It was progress report time. I cried before I gotten my paper. I cried worse after I gotten it. I kept crying and people came to me and gave me hugs and comfort me. Thx so much guys. I appreciated it :') Well. I only got myself to blame for all this. I know that I just gotta do better the next time. Like pull up my socks during this holiday. Mug all the way!! Yes that is my goal for now. Nothing shall distract me anymore. Nothing. And that includes you.

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Forgotten.

2011-03-08T07:12:00.001-08:00

I was left thrown on the ground bring trampled over by millions of people.

I forgotten the meaning of happiness. Can someone please tell me? Everyday I worry or pounder over my problems. I get tired of putting up that fake smile and telling everyone that I'm happy. That I'm fine when inside I'm not. When inside I'm dying.

It hurts to have to pretend. Pretending over and over again to the people I truly care about. I just think its mean. But no one can imagine how much I've been through. No. One. I've gone through to much in life. Maybe I haven't. Maybe I'm just being over paranoid. Maybe its just me.

Here's to you:
Remember me? Your bestfriend? Yup I'm the one who stuck by you when everything in your life fell apart. I'm the one who cared about you. The one who bothered to take my time out to listen to you. To help you out when you had no strength to move on. Yup I was the one. And what did you tell me? You said you will always be there for me. Well you did, but sooner or later you got tired of listening to me. You no longer cared. Well, now you just left this friendship hanging. And you did a pretty good job at ignoring this. Yah friend my ass ah friend.

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Sparks fly

2011-03-07T06:18:00.001-08:00

Fucking stress.

I failed like almost all my subjects (i think?) ugh. I can't afford to fail. And yknow what really makes me go crazy. Is that I fail my subjects my 1 or 1/2 mark!!!!!!!!! Omg you tell me now. How I can not be angry at myself? They were all careless mistakes which becomes a gr8 habit of mine to do in every paper. And POA intensive during March Holidays. Oh goodness no thx. Seeing slacker ho's face for 2 hours I rather not. I'd rather use that time to study alone or have intensive with Mr Potato. He teach better than Ho. So annoyed.....

Argh I'm scared for this coming wednesday. You know something. Honestly you don't deserve such authority cause well you really got no sense of responsibilities and prioritism. Gosh I really want to see you gone.

We cool st Margs people manage to trend #stmargsissofly within an hour! Amazing right (Y) this is worldwide ok! We're still trending #2 amongst SG. First school to make history. Hahahah 070311 St Margarets Day :-)

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Please don't go

2011-03-05T07:26:00.001-08:00

Does it really matter anymore? I tried. I really did try. But guess what, you didn't even bother to care. And do you know something I care about our friendship more than you can imagine. But it breaks me to see us drifting.

Every single time I see you do something with someone else but not me in my face. I break apart inside. I guess you don't notice. Because my smile covers up my pain. I really want you back.

I wait and hope/wish for the same thing everyday but it never happens. I end up disappointed. I guess I really don't deserve to be happy. Why am I feeling this way? Haven't I been through this a thousand and one times. But everytime I do, it breaks me apart more and more.

Sadgirl96.

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Light up when you smile

2011-02-23T06:07:00.001-08:00

This is too stressful fr me. Sec 3 life has rly taken a toll over my life. Not only am I failing my tests but there's also cca shit and class comm shit.... Honestly I feel like I'm about to fall apart but its only the second month of the year going to the third. And I'm alrd feeling this way? This can't be. I'm just so afraid fr the rest to come. Because honestly this is too much fr me to handle.

Put aside studies and school. Wht abt my friendship life? Not going great as well. Every single day same drama. Every single day I feel like crying. Sometimes it gets too much tht all I feel like doing is dying. I know it sounds suicidal but feel my pain. I have to see people every single day of my life. And knowing we aren't as close. Knowing tht we're on the verge of losing it. Honestly tht rly puts me off from everything.

I can't help but feel like I'm not wanted. I can't help but feel like everyone hates me. I can't help but feel insecure all the time. I always have my doubts and assumptions. Every single time. Sometimes or in fact all the time I want to just remove my brain. Because this is affecting me badly. I cannot go on like this.

Imissyou. Ihopeyourealize.

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You tossed it in the trash

2011-02-20T02:58:00.000-08:00

If heartache was a physical pain, I could face it.

Hi. So friday was like half day fr us coz of O's. Had bloody LIT :-( But after tht was fun, fun and FUN :-D Thx Panchat & Heng fr the fun and laughter ^^ We had kfc + fail neoz. I so sad sia. We wasted one neoz. And in the end could took only 3. Come out all same size sia. So damn sad. But had fun 'emo-ing' in the booth yo ^^

Look at this cutie. Pierre Khoury!!! <3 Must watch Junior Masterchef frm naow on :-) My parents keep telling me abt this show which i am super lazy to watch :-p But than everyone started spazzing over him on Twitter. And than I was like I must watch it so tht I won't feel left out. But bloody hell he's such a cutie yay yay ;-)

FLB was yesterday. Which I didn't go. I nvr will unless I beg my parents like crazy to let me go fr this flea. Omygoodness look at the rings!!!!!! It was frm flb. (Taken frm Kerilyn's fb) Hahah I want em all :-( But so sad. I not so rich to get em. Poor me. Lol I will go fr the next one hopefully. I pray to god tht I can make it there!! Omg you'll be mine. Lol

Tired of imitations;

2011-02-17T00:36:00.000-08:00

Happy Birthday Natali Ghui :-)

School's been a ball of suck. Homework piles up everyday. Omygod I am feeling so stressed coz of cca stuff + tests + assignments. I wonder how I will be l8r once I become like main leader and shit. Fml.

I just hope fr a better school life prz. I do not want to keep failing. If I do i do not know wht to say. And can I just say this;
I am not by or les or wtv. I'm a human with feelings. I have rights to post wht shit I want. Don't judge anyone by wht they type or say. You just don't know.

I follow you like a lost puppy

2011-02-10T01:28:00.000-08:00

School's been sucky yah. Homework + tests + GAs to do :-( Why is Sec 3 life so miserable! I don't mind having back my sec 2 life. Tho 2010 rly sucked bad. But heck it honestly. I want it back )': Feeling the stress. Its too overwhelming. I so stressed tht I can cry. Whuuut the shit lah. Tomorrow's camp + Sjsm sigh so sian can :-( Sad life to the maximum.

Honestly I miss it. May I have you back? You hear me talk/rant but actually you don't listen. I miss you like ugh aishoafhakhdahdajkdh )': Fml. Its ok yah.

Be my valentine plz?

Omfg I swear this girl is damn fucking lucky!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'd ttly die if Justin were to surprise me and if I sat on his lap. Oh fuck I'm dying inside alrd :-p Omg he damn cute I cannot take it <3 I want to watch Neversaynever!!! ^^

xx

When I find you, it'll be alright

2011-02-09T06:31:00.005-08:00

I miss you.

I miss how things used to be. I miss how you'd smile at me whenever I see you. I miss how you'd hug me. I miss how you hold my hand. I miss everything.

I really do.

Maybe its ok to you, but really it was never to me. I acted fine on purpose just to show you that I'm a strong girl. But I guess you could read through me and tell that I wasn't fine. Why did that happen honestly )':

I don't get much of that anymore. Actually no more. I really want it all back. I guess its wishful thinking on my part.

Hi. I miss you badly. But I do wish you all the best. I'll be here forever and always! Iloveyou.

xx

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I was enchanted to meet you

2011-02-05T07:49:00.001-08:00

Hi. Happy Chinese New Year!! Its red everywhere yes? Head to USS with my famz on cny. Had gr8 fun there!!!!! And I took the most scariest ride of my life. No joke!! The battlestar galactica omg. They were having some testrun so we took it. It was so god damn scary omg. Imagine it dropping frm 12 stories. Siao right with the 360 degrees turn. Worse rollercoaster ever. I cried coz I was too terrified omg wtf :-/ I came out alive and feeling all woozy. O well. Wht an experience!

School's abt to start soon. Have not finish my cme, maths GA and Malay compo. Mati )-: I got to rush math and malay tomorrow. Goodness why am I such a typical slacker? Fml.

Honestly. I cannot stand this anymore. I rly can't. Why are both of you just acting damn rude to me? Did I do something to piss you off and make you h8 me? Honestly I wish to know. I can't sit down and let everything be the way it is. I can't walk by you and act like we do not know each other. Because it just hurts to know the person whom I used to had so much with is now a stranger to me. Why?! I rly can't take it any longer. Its just too much.

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I was enchanted to meet you;

2011-02-01T06:05:00.001-08:00

Hi. I h8 sec 3 life. It makes me want to cry frm the overwhelming stress and tests tht I have not been doing well coz of me not studying or not being able to cope/ pay attention. This sux. I can't continue being like this dammit. Help me someone (!!!!)

My bloody jacket got fucking stolen leaving me there to got freezed to death. -'- Ok heck it. So should I go to Surabaya? I don't mind going since priority to malay students. Than I can bond with my cool malay friends yo :-) O well see how it goes. Kekeke Chinese New Year celebration is tomorrow. Half day yay ~ Lunch with Abby and my sister after schoooooooool ok (-:

I just don't know wht to say anymore. I can't just sit down and watch things be like it is now. I. Just. Can't.

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Or do you feel the same

2011-01-28T04:59:00.000-08:00

Right here Right now ~

School's been such a bore like to the maximum. All I get are tests or homework tht piles like a mountain. Wht has the world turn into! I had 3 tests this week. And I did like super super badly fr MRT. Fuck my bloody life. I got fucking 8 over 40. I want to cry. I miss being good at maths I rly do )-: Wht happen to the world )-: Ugh I need to buck like crazy. If this happens again, I'm finding a tutor right away! I need one fr SS terribly. Shum ain't in school coz of some surgery. So this stupid looking pedo teacher is teaching us. He doesn't teach at all -_- And there's a bloody test this coming tuesday. Fml

Guides today was quite slack. I wanted drills. I have no idea when was the last time I did drills. I think I forgotten everything alrd. Hahahah yay amazing (Y) Dance prac was super epic. Lol and so was the total defence badge thingy! I lost the video twice ok )-: Windows Movie Maker h8 me. Ayo. Don't feel like staying overnight fr SJI combine. I guess its quite stupid eh? I want to go home and come back again plzplzplz )-: Or can I just fall sick and don't attend at all. Damn lazy to the maximum.

Thought you'll always be mine;

2011-01-25T06:31:00.001-08:00

School this week has been stressful/ok. Since Mr and Mrs Chua are not coming to school fr one whole week. *starts cheering*

No physics and english. Two lessons which I barely pay attention in. Hahahah tsk me. I think I should pay more attention in class. Like POA and elect geog. I damn scared fr poa lah. Got test on Thursday :-( I nvr pay attention in class always talk and laugh so in the end this happens. Sigh sigh. Finally understood wht Ms Chan after wht like 6 lessons of her? Yay ~ Maths is getting harder naow. I want to cry!! I think I'll fail this week's MRT. Spent half my time sleeping. The paper I anyhow do coz ONLY 3 FRIGGIN QUESTIONS ON INDICES. Wht crap is this you tell me naow!! The rest were fucking sec two questions tht I nvr remember >( So pissed off lah.

Ok bye

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She will be loved;

2011-01-22T06:46:00.001-08:00

I tend to get insecure.

Honestly. Living with you guys, drives me up the wall. Why do I get blame fr not doing something? I mean honestly I do have a life to yknow. Why don't you consider my feelings too? Am I not your daughter? You demoralize me and me only. You scold me and me only. Why not the rest? Am I tht hateful. Time and again it has always been me. I may not be who you want me to be. Why won't you just get tht everything has change. Tht nothing will stay the same. Why?

I don't get it. Why do I live in a world where no one is truly happy fr a second? We're just so sensitive abt the things tht happen around us. And where people come and go. Why do they do so! Don't they ever consider people's feelings.

Why am I feeling like this! I just want to jump down right now. Thts how I feel now.

Sry fr such a suicidal post...

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And you can't deal with the pain;

2011-01-19T06:17:00.001-08:00

I think school has been such a bore? Sux to be sitting in the front. But it gets fun coz I can disturb Angel and Charlene. I suck yay.

I do not understand POA and SS. Our poa teacher is like idk lol. But I like poa. Shum is having some surgery. So relief teachers takes us. Walao the teacher look like pedo/chekopek sia. He damn geeky somemore. "I learn everything frm the computer. One month without the computer I will die." And he went yes with his hands up in the air when the projector started working. Er wtf? Lol wht has the world turn into srsly!

I went to AMK hub with Joan, Stacia and Sarah. Damn coooooool lah ok. I saw Jaslyn's sister. Hahahah I felt like a stalker/PI coz I told Jaslyn abt it. Omg whuuuut the. Went to Artbox and Rubi/Cotton on to get presents. Walaooo all of us were itching to get stuff plus they were like fuck cheap ok. I meant the accesories part. Sigh next time. I should stop spending money on food -_- Ughhhhh

The truth hurts but lies are worse. I really am wondering whether its the truth or the lie. Please tell me

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We're like venus and mars;

2011-01-17T05:37:00.001-08:00

I think the life of a sec three is making me go totally bonkers!

I have like a thousand and one things on my mind. I can't balance between studies and personal life.

I spent a gr8 rainy afternoon with Sweetha and Seraphina :-) They truly made my day. Somehow talking to pthem clear my thoughts. More gr8 days ahead to spend with them. Heppi :-)

Honestly. I feel happy. But underneath all tht happiness, there's just a layer of sadness. Which are my problems left unsolved. Talking to Amanda made me realize tht I had so much things left untouch. Sigh....wht am I suppose to do :-( Rly idk

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Ready to love again

2011-01-16T06:03:00.001-08:00

When was the last time I said I was happy?
When was the last time I was hyped fr no reason?
When was the last time!

Yo. When was the last time I blogged? Been a while eh. Hahah so I survived the first week of proper lessons and honestly, I almost died in it. I had so much things to do in tht week plus a ton of homework piling up day by day. And when I get home, I'm always dead tired. My weekends will be always either I'm out or at home doing both housework and homework. You tell me. How to relax? I'm finding it hard to balance. Ah fml.

Ok nevermind. Hahahah I love 3/9!! ^^^^^^^ Yay I rly do omg. If I don't laugh with them fr a day, I might just slap myself. Lol!!

I am such a blur sotong like rly to the maximum or something!! Yknow when people are talking abt something else, I join in and start talking abt something which is ttly not wht they were talking abt. Whuuuut the shit right! And worse thing. I went to put my hand up fr idk wht reason fr the photography thing. In the end, I'm stuck at knowing wht to do -_- Srsly such a blur head. Idk how to cure. Lol whuuut the shit.

Stress.... H8 how sec three life is going :-/

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Listen to your heart;

2011-01-10T06:51:00.001-08:00

I'm sry if I'm in the way of this group. Fr me, if I ever did anything wrong. I'm sry. Kick/throw/disban/forbid out of this. Ok I got nothing to argue against coz I fully respect your decision. Because fr me. I still luv each and everyone of you the same! No matter wht, my love fr all of you is still same. So plz just get on with life without me ok! (:

Hey you. We're back to square one

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I go back to december all the time;

2011-01-08T06:51:00.001-08:00

I'm back frm camp!! The best camp ever!!!!!!!!!!!!!

First day - everyone was so grouchy and just wanted to go home. As the second and third day came, all of us had so much fun just singing, screaming and laughing till we couldn't do anything. It made me realize how just being happy ends it all. You'll completely forget every setback tht occured to you. And this will nvr change because 3/9 is the best class I can't go a day without :'-) Thx guys fr all the laughter and fun you guys gave me!! :'-) We had the funniest and wackiest trainers ever! Wani & Addam ftw ^^^^^^ <3 All of us cried like shit when campfire came to an end when they sang Just the way you are. Unforgettable memories :-) S3 camp is lovedd ^^ Pictures were taken on the bus. Gr8888 times :-D

I just can't watch you get hurt anymore,

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I don't know how to get there;

2011-01-04T07:12:00.001-08:00

Hallo! First day of school was ok? Idk :-/ But so far 3/9 has been a gr8 class. I hope to've fun with all of them in camp :-) Joan ah Joan! Why you nvr go :-( Leave me alone in our high possibility even grp!! So I left with Sarah Yong and the rest of the other people in class. I hope I hope I hope. I know someone in my grp. Pleaseeeee!! Idk why but I feel so fucking uneasy abt things :-( Its like I feel so afraid I'll be the nub to bring a huge bag and wear trackpants to school. I don't want tht!! Or at least remove tht lousy feeling away first :-( Walao I feel like dying naow. I feel so kakdldkdjdkdkdldjdkdi tht I might die anytime :-/ Walao feeling go away plz. I so afraid I might cry!! Oh goodnesss. Why so ~emotional~ ah! Tsk. Wtv. I need to've fun during camp with my classmates and bond with them no matter wht! I should believe my seniors tht is fun :-) I hope wtv doesnt come! Its gonna suck bad if it does :-/ I'm going to be a loner. Poor me. Whuuuut the shit. Syafiqa stop wallowing yourself in selfpity -_-

I h8 the distance between us. You may find it alright but I don't. I know you well enough tht you nvr tell anyone why you aren't talking to them personally. I don't want to sound mean but honestly. The feeling of being ignored by someone whom you care alot abt sux. And it gets annoying and hurtful coz you see them everyday but when you wish to say hi, you dare not to coz you're friendship with her is hot and cold. It honestly sux. I don't wish to sound mean. But the truth hurts. I rly want to know why! I h8 the distance between us. Knowing we're drifting apart and no one is doing anything to patch it up sux. But worse part, you don't even know why this is happening. Sigh I rly hope fr us to be ok again if possible.... Coz honestly, first day of school kinda sucked coz of you :-/

I'll shut up. I'm going fr camp next three days. Sigh going to be mad tired. Bye

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Forget you plz;

2011-01-03T07:22:00.001-08:00

In a few hours, everyone will be waking up to get up and get ready to go to school. And naow everyone is sleeping alrd. I feel like a sucker fr staying up fr the dumbest reason. My eyebags are like as dark as Panda's. The worse eyebags damn.

Hey someone. I rly would luv it if you get out of my head. I want/need to forget you. You're just distracting me. Why must you be so you! I feel so sad coz I can't see you anymore. We might as well be strangers..... Welcome to my life!

First day of school. I just h8 it. Why are everyone so eggcited :-( Whts there to be eggcited abt!! I feel like a loser coz I don't feel the least bit eggcited. I just h8 first days. Sux.

A new day, a new beggining. Honestly I don't feel like a sec three. Blah ksjskskslskslsjdjs :-( I need to study harder and play a lot lesser. Need to start preparing fr my Ns. So fast omg :-( Where has my holidays gone to! I wasted it all away. Walao wht a way to start (Y)

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Its beautiful night;

2011-01-02T09:21:00.001-08:00

Tell me wht am I suppose to do. I dare not sleep coz I'm afraid I'll dream of you again. HOLYSHIT I'm dead.... I want to forget you plz. Thinking abt you makes me have hopes to talk to you. Trying ways and means but still. Sigh :-( I guess things will nvr go the way I want them too. Ahhhh, why must you be so jskskslsksjnsksjsjsjs!! I need to forget you like naow. I just got myself in deep sea. Added a new problem (?) in my life. FORGET YOU NAOW NAOW NAOW PLZ DEAR GOD HELP ME :-(

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I can feel you all around;

2011-01-02T08:40:00.001-08:00

I was thinking abt you.
Thinking abt me.
Thinking abt us.
Wht we're gonna be.
Open my eyes.
It was only just a dream.

Its alrd the 3rd of January which is Cheryl Lim's birthday!! Happy Birthday dearest Egokia!! ^^^^^ Enjoy your day being 15 ;-) Y u so fast old? :-P Make me feel young. Thx thx :-)

Three days have passed by in 2011. Which is rly very fast. Tomorrow's school. Imagine tht. Seeing everyone after so long. Hahahha awkwarddddd :-/

Well my eyes are closing so bye.

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Omg longest post I think;

2011-01-01T07:15:00.001-08:00

Hey world!!! ^^
Currently I'm watching America's Got Talent while blogging. I'm abt to die typing dedications fr everyone. Hahahah omg hands be prepared yo ~

HEYHO AMANDA KWAN ♥ Happy New Year!!! ^^ Thx fr everything. Thx fr being there fr me when I needed someone. Thx fr just being you!! So I'd like to say tht 2010 fr both of us have been full of ups and downs. I rly had tons of fun with youuuu. Be it those lame jokes, or laughing madly randomly on the phone. And the one thing I'm truly sry fr this year is the fights. I'm so sry :-( I rly am so glad tht we manage to patch it back ♥ And I hope fr more fun with you and guides sixsome ^^ Plus other people of course. Have a gr88888 year ahead!! Forget everything in 2010 and start afresh ok? :-)

HEYHO VANESSA LIM ♥ Happy New Year ^^ I had a rly gr8 time with you this year. We grew close within less than the first half of the year!! Thx fr everything. Thx fr being there fr me whenever I needed a friend. Truly appreciated your pep talks many. I know we grew further apart as the year pass by. I'm truly sry fr my sucky attitude tht made you h8 me. I don't blame you. I hope we can still remain as friends!!! We don't have to be close friends if you don't wish to. I fully understandd ^^ Hope you'll have a gr8888 year ahead of you. I will always pray fr youu and hope things will be alright. Leave out the unhappy 2010 and enjoy 2011 okok ^^ Anything I'll be here ~

HEYHO YUHUI ♥ Happy New Year ^^ Thx fr always being there fr me when I needed someone. Thx fr always taking 93 with me. You always willing to w8 fr me :-P Tsk!! But thx anyway. Gr8ly appreciated yo ~ Thx fr everything just everything :-) Ahhaahha thx fr all the pep talks you gave me and those lame jokes you would nvr fail to tell me. And thx fr always being my eat-chilli-to-drown-ourselves-in-sadness-buddy ^^ I WANT TO DO THT AGAIN JUST FR FUNN ^^ Hhahahah so cool sia ~ You rock and should continue rocking coz you're damn naise!!! I hope you'll have a gr888 year ahead of youu ^^ Forget the unhappiness you faced in 2010 and move on ok ^^ Anything can find me and we go eat spicy ytf ^^^^^^

HEYHO JENNIFER ♥ Happy New Year ^^ Thx fr always being there fr me whenever I needed someone. Thx fr everything. Hahahha omg Idk wht to say ahhhhhhh ~ Okokok Jennifer you rock and you're super naise!! You should continue rocking Vanessa's world lol :-P Hahah omg gr888 year ahead fr you yo!! Anything you got me ok :-)

THE CLIQUE ♥ Omg!!!! Happy New Year to all of you assholes ♥ THX FR EVERYTHING!! I hope life fr you out there is pretty gr8 ^^ I have not talk to some of you fr quite some time. Let's catch up soonnnn ~ Omg I remember this day and time last year, we were on the phone having a countdown to 2010. So coooooool ^^ You shit asses were practically screaming in my ear when the clock struck 12. But just minutes before tht, you guys were squealing!!! Ah Luv you guys like shit ♥ We were damn close fr sometime. We used to spend morning time before assembly sitting outside 2/5 waiting fr each other to reach school. Meet up during recess or sometimes after school. I miss all of your nonsense :-( I hope we can patch up againnn. I want tht plz ~ okok Hope you will have a gr888 year ahead of you!! Anything I'll be here ^^^^^^^

HEYHO BONTEE ♥ Happy New Year!! ^^ THX FR EVERYTHING DEAR!! I truly appreciated it. Thx fr standing by me when I needed someone. Thx fr always trying to make time fr me. In a sentence, THX FR EVERYTHING ^^ I'm so sry fr the miscommunication tht happened between us. And sry fr the time when we almost didn't talk. I'm rly sry to the maximum :-( I'm glad we're ok again. I hope fr us to be close friends againn :-) I'd the best time with you and the sixsome during guides especially drills. Drills had been the best time during guides. We'll without fail be together and laugh our way through guides. I miss it so much :-( When we take over, lets do more drills yo. Hahaha overall just have an awesome year ahead of you ^^^ forget abt the unhappiness in 2010 and try to enjoy 2011 ok. Anything I'll be here :-)

HEYHO DASH ♥ Happy New Year!! ^^ THX FR EVERYTHING GIRLFRIEND ;-) I truly appreciate everything tht you've done with me. Giving me hugs whenever you see me. Even if I'm sick, you gave me a hug and gave me your ytf and took away mine. Truly appreciated tht :'-) You made me your gf on our malay/indian learning journey. The most retarded one lor. Hahahah had fun with you and Jafni ^^^^^ Thx fr always being concern abt me. Trying to advise me and stuff. Sry if I made you angry or anything without realizing. Rly sry. I promise no more of tht hopefully ^^ Anyway. Have a gr88 year ahead of you. Forget the unhappiness in 2010 and move on. ANYTHING I'LL BE HERE ^^

HEYHO SWEETHA ♥ Happy New Year!! ^^ THX FR EVERYTHING AUNTY. Thx fr always being there to liseten to my crap. Thx fr always being there to read those letters before giving it to someone. Thx fr being a JUSTIN BIEBER FAN LIKE ME :-) Let's go to his concert tgt okok ^^^^^ Thx fr lending me your DSLR when I needed it. Simply, THX FR EVERYTHING. Appreciated them like alottt ~ Hope you'll have a gr888 year ahead of you. Forget the unhappy memories in 2010 and move on. ANYTHING I'LL BE HERE ^^

HEYHO MOTHERVAGINAS ♥ Happy New Year!! ^^ You guys have been such a wonderful bunch of friends. I luv spending my time with you guys ^^ You guys nvr fail to make me laugh with your forever horny jokes, flirty tone and those lame jokes. I'll definitely miss them coz I'll be going to another class :-( But we can still hang out yo. I'll miss the loitering around the level. Going to the general office and even to the toilet a thousand times. Ah GOOD TIMES ^^ I hope tht the year will be gr8 fr youu. All the best. Those unhappy memories in 2010 forget them and move on. ANYTHING I'LL BE HERE ^^

HEYHO SERAPHINA ♥ Happy New Year!! ^^ THX FR EVERYTHING. Omg my hand damn pain naow frm writing so much :-( Okok. Sry ah. I write short one fr youuu ~ Thx fr listening to me and advising me. You should stop thinking abt her. She not worth it lah. Stupid person but she's still my friend no doubt lah.... :-/ But don't think abt her ok. Cheer up!! Leave all the unhappy memories behind and move on. ANYTHING I'LL BE HERE ~

HEYHO SIXSOME ♥ Happy New Year!! ^^ I'll work on the name most definitely yo ~ THX FR ALL THE FUN YOU GAVE ME. Thx fr making me smile and laugh even when I wasn't happy. THX THX ^^ Hope to make guides a better place tgt. Ok enjoy 2011 :-)

And so..... To the rest who aren't mentioned, I'd luv to write fr you but my hands are exhausted :-( SRY SRY. Thx fr everything you guys have done fr me. Forget 2010 and move on to 2011 with a positive outlook. Andddd ANYTHING I'LL BE HERE ;-)

OH YAY FINALLY DONE!! :-D

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Sometimes tears say all there is to say;

2010-12-30T08:12:00.001-08:00

I'm thinking. Currently alot is running through my mind. Memories tht are flashing in my mind like a video showing the whole 2010. The memories and thoughts is rly tearing me apart. The more I think abt it, the more it puts me to tears. I'm rly just waiting fr the day tht I'm able to sleep and nvr wake up or at least to sleep my pain and troubles away. I'd rly love tht alot plz.

I feel tht there is this invisible wall in between us wrecking our friendship. Everytime we see each other, we barely mutter a word. We walk past each other like strangers who nvr met. Wht happen to us being friends? I may be tht hateful to you. I don't blame you. But why won't you tell me where I've gone wrong. It rly sux not having to know the reason. I rly wish I can be friends with you again. Hopefully maybe just one day....

We were strangers. I still remembered. You were the person I sat beside during the first day of assembly. Than we talked and we found out this common interest we had. We became close friends. And suddenly we grew apart. Whenever I try talking to you, you always give me the not interested tone. And tht you'd rather spent time with people than me. So far once, you nvr asked me out. I rly wonder.... Its ok. I hope you lead a wonderful life ahead of you without me in it.

I definitely most definitely missed you! We used to be just friends. Those hi bye type. Nvr used to be close. Than during the holidays, we started talking. Confiding in one another. I had so much fun l8 night chatting with you. I miss those times. Nowadays, I don't even have you coming to me asking me fr anything. How I miss those days like shit. Somewhere along the way, we grew closer and closer. And now further and further apart. I rly h8 how I screwed this up. I guess I didn't cherish you way enough. But naow, you seem to put people first. I no longer exist in your dictionary. Well I hope life fr you out there will be gr8 without me. Anything I'll be here.

I miss our wonderful bunch of shit. I miss how I can always count on any of you if I needed someone. Naow, no more. Everyone just got to caught up with their own lives tht we make no time fr each other. I hope all of you are having a wonderful life. Miss you shit asses. I miss tht countdown to 2010 phonecall you guys gave me. You were practically screaming in my ear. But it was the best New year I ever had just by being on the phone. Thx assholes. Surely missed your nonsense in school. Sigh enjoy life.

Less than 24 hours to first Jan omg. Well Happy New Year everybody <3 Enjoy 2011 ^^ Btw those weren't dedications hahahah

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We were both young;

2010-12-29T07:38:00.001-08:00

I'm not a princess
This ain't a fairytale
I was a dreamer before you when you let me down
Maybe I was naive

May I admit something? I fcking miss you like shit :-( Why why why must you be over the seas naow! Its been a week yes since you've left. I have not heard a word frm you. God, I sound as tho you migrated. But yes I miss you so much until like this. How how how!! :-(

Ok enough.... 2 days more to 1/1/11 ~ Oh gr8. There's 4 ones. And people say this means a good year ahead? Ok wht a crazy belief you'll have. Hahahah I still can't believe school's abt to start. I don't want eh. I want to be sick. I fcking h8 school esp when it comes to the reopening of school. Ugh h8 it like shit >( Sigh sigh.

I spent a productive day today? Bought my new school bag finally. Its so blue-ish (Y) Hahahah had ice cream @ swensens ^^ My sister damn funny omg. She saw the seesmic app on my phone. And she was like - 'Eh wht game is this? I want to try!' Hahahah blurrr!!

School tomorrow @ 2pm. Such an odd timing but wtv. I rly don't want sia :-( Ugh plus so little people going. Whuuuuut the shit! Only 4 going. Walao sux sia. Fml

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Its just too little to late;

2010-12-28T07:54:00.001-08:00

Hey. I got bloody itchy fingers I swear. Tempted to blog everytime :-/

So I went to find fr my school shoe and bag just naow. Parents sux. They always think they're right. Ok yknow wht I'm just sick and tired of listening to your opinions and nagging. Yes, I'm like a complete failure to you. No matter how hard I try you are nvr pleased right? Anyway. I'm the one wearing my shoes and carrying my bag. Whts your problem if I want wht I want? Honestly wht you choose aren't nice. I rather carry/wear something I feel comfortable wearing. Be it appearance wise or inside wise. But no, you think tht you are right with all the options you give me. The options you give me are none I wanted. Yes I do not deserve anything. Honestly just tell me str8 in my face before making a wasted trip lah. Is it tht hard? Instead of pmsing the whole time. Telling me to stop talking back or showing tantrum or being rude.

Fr your information, I h8 h8 h8 being rude to people. But you guys annoy the shit out of me. Like tht how I won't be rude towards you? And if I cry is my problem. I do not cry fr the sake of something dumb like a shoe or a bag. 5 years old does tht. Not 14 -_- There's more to it than it seems. Teenagers cry alot. You may think I cry over something small. But we never did cry over tht. I think you should start putting yourself into my shoes. You feel angry. I also feel angry ok.

I was so fcking pissed just naow. My parents are annoying. You spent $100 on my shoes. And thts surprising. I think you very funny plz. Not the first time this happened lah. Ayo coz of tht, I can't get anything else. Walaoooo you think I don't know how hard it is to earn money is it? If I can, I would work and not spend your money at all. Save your money. I don't like to spend your money btw. GO SELL MY SHOES LAH!!! You want your $100 so badly go sell lah. So fcking pissed off. Ugh.

Kthxbai

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Down like a g6;

2010-12-28T04:10:00.001-08:00

I'm so down. My family srsly treats me like fuck

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And the world will live as one;

2010-12-27T22:39:00.000-08:00

Hallo. I rly nolyf yes thx ;-) Was texting Amanda Kwan. We were spamming each other with lyrics. Siaooooo ^^ Currently I need to shit :-p Gross I know. Hohoho. Wtv. Tht comment may proceed to my ass thx.

Can I comment abt Greyson Chance? Ok I'm not gonna care. So Greyson Chance fans plz don't take it to heart. I'm just merely saying wht I think. Ok. When I watched his music video - Waiting outside the lines fr the first time today. I know I'm slow. But shut up! His face looks like a friggin kid. I couldn't stand it :-/ I thought he was 9. No offence :-/ But now I know his 13 years old! I respect him fr his awesome voice and song ^^ I luv his song still. Its like beyond amazing yo ~

I was a dreamer before you;

2010-12-27T08:23:00.001-08:00

And again I'd the very huge urge to blog.... Blame meh itchy fingers yo! Yes you may say I've nolyf but tht comment may proceed to my ass thx ^^

I want Justin Bieber front tix fr his awesome pawsome concert pretty plz mommy & daddy! Fr birthday present. I will not ask fr anything more promise (-: *crosses my heart*

Hey you got a smile tht can light up the whole town but I haven't seen it in a while since she brought you down. But I know you better than tht. Why are you still doing with a girl like tht!

I am currently texting Seraphina poon abt dreams. Yes we're on the topic abt dreams. Lame but who cares. Super jealous at her dream god dammit >( It rly had got me thinking abt all the ~emotional~ dreams I had. I nearly died in the dream itself and as well as reality. It was so real tht it felt like it actually happened in real life. I felt like slapping myself so badly fr tht. I realize on how many friendships got wrecked because of me; my dreams! Walao you stupid dreams plz go and fuck yourself next time. But the dream tht rly brought me down is where you were in tears right infront of me. But before I could mutter a word, you chose someone else to go to instead of me. Tht killed me.

Ok enough sad talk... I went to Orchard ystd/today. Make sense, no? Roger tht. Basically Orchard with family on 27/12/10. Hahah wtf my parents suck. Up till naow, I've no school bag or school shoe. Coz my parents won't give in to buying me sneakers after the past experiences with holey shoes. And school bags were either to pricey or not suitable fr me. Like tht when to get my school stuff?! I h8 bata shoes fr your information. No bata/north star shoes plz. H8 it like to the maximum. No offence to the users/buyers.... ;-)

I bought myself a cool blouse and small bag ^^ Sales were like everywhere in Orchard. People acted as tho things were free of charge. They were charging at the items like mad cows/ kiasus. Tht gave me and my mom a headache. Fr example Rubi Shoes. The music was so loud and the shop was covered with people. Every centimetre of the shop. Crazy right! Tsk

School is abt to start. Somehow I always h8 the new school term. I seem to always be afraid to come to.school somehow :-/ Yah I'm weird thts me. I always think I am a loner. I'm so afraid tht I see everyone meeting and hugging someone tht I don't get to do so. Walao I so negative sia. I hope to find people yo.

I hope to have a gr8 time with my new class 3/9 ^^ Let's achieve the awesome class award. Lol.

Kbye ;-)

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Where is the love;

2010-12-27T04:44:00.000-08:00

This maybe my millionth time saying this but yes 2010 is coming to a closure. Sad or happy? I do not seem to know :-/ Life's been full of ups and downs. Certainly do not wish to live through a 2010 in 2011 if tht made sense. I really do not wish to bring painful and bitter memories frm 2010 into 2011. Tht will just put right where I began. I want to trust everyone again. Its like I had no one to trust any longer after people happened. I want tht feeling where I can just run to someone and trusting them with whatever I said. But like I always say, Never get your hopes up. Getting your hopes up and than looking at it crashing right before your very eyes isn't pretty.

I would like to say to every sad kid out there tht Life isn't pretty and its full of ups and downs but we can pull through with god's grace.

Like we used to;

2010-12-25T20:50:00.000-08:00

More photos in fb ;-) Which is currently uploading like a snail naow :-/
Hahahah Life's been wonderfully sucky I suppose? My family treats me like fuck :-/ Yah wtv, I'll stfu ;-) Hahahah Merry belated Christmas and Happy Boxing day (?) Weird little world we've. Who in the world celebrates boxing day. Lol ~

So 2010 is rlly ending soon. In abt 5 days yez? Looking back at how much I went through in just a day has rlly got me thinking. What if I nvr went through this. Wht if my life is rlly fantastic righy naow. I probably might not have lost everything I had. I fought, cried, got disappointed, unexpected happened, laughter, joy, anger abd so much more. It rlly has been a rollercoaster ride fr me. I had nvr expected myself to go through so much. Well, wht can you do to something tht has alrd been vanished. I just hope fr a gr8 year ahead. Good is good enough. I rlly can't make myself go through another 2010. I wish to not bring forward the bitter memories to 2011. I don't wish to live in a year full of bitterness anymore. Its fr a fact tht you can't ignore tht there'll be bitterness along the way. But too much causes hatred easily. Am I right? Ok end it. So in simple terms. A new beginning awaits us.
I rlly wish I'm able to go back to like how we were. I missed it so much I can die. Kidding but I want you back. I know I messed things up. Oh god I suck.
So I went to Tokyo, Japan and JB. Haahahah I had quite an experience in both. I saw Mr Bean behaviour a like in Tokyo. He acted exactly like Mr Bean. He scared my whole family I swear. Ok tht was Tokyo. In JB. I chased fr a bus with a luggage in hand fr my grandmother. I got scolded fr being l8. When I did nothing. My life rocks huh -_-
Justin Bieber is coming to SG (Confirmed) :-D I ttly want to go. I gonna start saving money. Hahahah but I wish tht my parents would sponser me the tix. Front row plz ^^ As birthday present also cannnn!! I won't ask fr anything else. Hahahah.

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Christmas will end in 2 minutes

2010-12-25T08:02:00.001-08:00

First I'd like to wish every single one of you out there a Merry blessed Christmas ;-) I hope you'd have a gr8 year ahead of you yez I mean it. Fr all the sad kiddos out there. Cheer up and smile. Forget 2010, focus on 2011. Move on yes. Hahahahha ok wtv I'll stfu bye

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YO

2010-12-21T06:36:00.001-08:00

Konichiwa Singapore (-:
I just came back frm JAPAN. Omfg my trip was frm start to finish one word A W E S O M E (Y) Yez I'm a happy girl coz I did manage to forget my troubles fr a little while. Gave myself a good break. Yay fr my accomplishment~

So Japan was indeed awesome. My tour group very friendly and nice. And so are the tour guides (-: I went to Mt Fuji fr the first day. Second to the fifth day I was mainly in Tokyo. And the the day before I left, I spent my entire day in Tokyo Disneyland. Gosh, tht place is friggin packed. The Japanese were like kiasu people. Hohoho. But overall fun yo!! Pictures and details I shall blog again next time.

Kthxbai (-:

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Shine in the light;

2010-12-14T00:51:00.000-08:00

Hey Blogger ;-)
Fr the past few days, I've been ranting about my shit. Hahahah pathetic little sucker (-: So I r gonna be flying off tomorrow. Bahaha I so eggcited sia ^-^ But still I need to go to School before tht fr 2 hours doing Idk what shit. Ah Fml...

Hahaha I hope to forget everything - My troubles actually. And enjoy myself yah? (-: Don't all of us deserve a break frm reality. Reality is harsh. And sadly we can't change tht fact. And we can't force each other to smile. Blahblahblah!

So who wanna send me off? I r gonna fly like a g6. Like a g6 ~ I'm just so lama. Tsktsk XD I miss everyone in schoooool! I wonder how are they doing. Can I've a party just so tht I can catch up with everyone? Bahaha Possible? 2010 is coming to an end in about 2-3 weeks. Thats really fast.... 2010 has been a crazy ride fr me. Looking back at all the heartbreaks, the pain, the smiles, the laughter, the troubles and everything. It really puts me to tears to actually have to experience so much in just one year.

Memories comes rushing back into my brain. Both painful and happy memories. Each has its own purpose fr it to happen. God always have a reason to put us in the state tht we're in. We must always be grateful fr what we've yah. Okeh okeh.

Till tomorrow or whenever ? Sayonara (-:

Maybe this is the end of my happiness;

2010-12-13T08:13:00.001-08:00

Maybe I'm done.
Maybe I am no longer allowed anything related to happy.
Maybe its time, I let things be the way they're.
Maybe I should just go.
Maybe I shouldnt leave any longer.
Every burden has come to haunt me.
What am I left to do?

My parents fought. My dad's selfcentered. Nothing is right in my life. I thought I could actually be blessed enough to have a happy family. An intact one. But looking at things, I won't be seeing much of happiness in this family anymore. They fight everytime. To the extend they wont even talk. And I've to bare all of this. My mom would come to me asking me about my dad's actions. Look, what can I do? I'm basically troubled enough. This is between you and your husband. Even if I wish to interfere, I dont think I can. I'm just a kid. You won't listen to me. But you should know tht the fact is, childreb suffers most when it comes to this. So yknow its up to you'll to decide. I'm super exhausted to try. I'm sorry.

Hey you. Why do you come and go? I know tht when it comes to reality, Friends come and go. No matter how hard we try to stop it. Thats reality.
Sigh I wish tht I could go back to those times. I miss your hugs, your letters, the l8 night msn conversation - us trying to cheer each other up. I miss everything about you. How I wish we can return to how things were! But you clearly told me who you wanted. Sigh I think its time fr me to give up on tht thought

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Stuck in the moment ;

2010-12-12T07:42:00.001-08:00

OMFG OMFG OMFG. JUSTIN DREW BIEBER IS COMING TO SG NEXT YEAR MAY 11 2011!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *screams and freak out like crazy!* If you wanna know how I found out, @bieberarmy_asia frm twitter friggin twitpic it. Tho justin didnt officially anounce it but still omfg!!!!!!! I r happykid4lyf right naow. But disappointing moment naow; Its during our friggin exams. Sux like to the maximum. Bleh!!! Okeh wtv, I hope he changes his date to a l8r date so tht I may attend his awesome pawsome concert ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!! Okeh enough of being extremely happy fr a minute there.

So today. I was like some friggin shit who kept crying. Ugh sux to the maximum. Over the same shit sigh... I cried in public so nuisance. About to cry again naow. Man I suck like to the maximum. No wonder even my dad wants to give up on me. Sux yah I just told the whole world.

Maybe I'm just not academically inclined. Maybe I suck so bad in my studies tht no matter how I try, I can never achieve gr8 results to appease you. Look, you may not say it in my face. Your expression and your attitude tells me. Why won't you just tell me - Yknow what do wtv you want. Lead your life the way you want. I no longer wanna care. I lost faith in you.
Yah you may not say but it tells me and it puts me to tears. And to you, you'll be like - don't need to cry lah. Whats there to cry over?
But haven't you thought to yourself, you may feel like you've lost faith and you're disappointed. How about me? I feel a thousand times worse than you. I feel like I've ttly given up on myself. Much less you. It sux to have my own dad to give up on me. Just no matter how hard I try, I can never seem to appease you. I wish I can anything to appease you. You always seem to compare me to another. I'm just tht academically inclined. Comparing me to someone whose way better than me. Demoralizes me to the bone. You saying - You've ttly given up. You're just waiting to go to ITE and not even aiming fr poly.
Tht thought never even crossed my mind once. I'm sad and hurt by the thought tht you placed such a harsh thought into me. You don't know the truth. You dont know how much I went through in life. My life isn't as cheerful as you may think so. Every minute, every second. I think about my problems. What do yknow? You only think tht I am a useless piece of shit. I am lazy. I dont wish to put in any effort in anything. Thats what you think. Thanks fr demoralizing me. I've got enough to think about.

My family thinks tht I'm their mofo maid. Everything also make me do. Hello. I'm not put on this earth to be your slave okeh. If possible, you want me to clean the house, wash the clothes, water the plants, cook and wtv. So tht you may live life like before. Go friggin dream on okeh. I've got enough. I can barely sit fr at least 10 minutes to relax. Coz of housework I can't do many of my own things. Ugh wtv

Yknow what. End this rant. Tomorrow I shall continue. Bye

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Scars remain,

2010-12-11T07:58:00.001-08:00

Its gonna be the mid of December soon. Sigh... See how time passes by so fast? Come to think of it, I never really spend my 2 months wisely. A ton of things have happened over the pass 2 months. It was quite an experience but not all are ever so amusing. How I wish, I can just get rid of all the negative portion of my life...

Don't you just find tht wonderfully nice? Yah if only life was ever tht nice to me. I'm so torn apart. I made a thousand and one mistakes in my life. All I regretted so badly.

I wish I wasn't a fool. A little gullible and naive fool tht swallows every single little lie tht people tell me. How many more lies can I swallow before I blow up? I don't think anymore.

I can never find anyone tht would actually stay true. All would leave me one by one. I'm just waiting fr the day where I completely die frm reality. And live life base of my fantasies. Retarded but wtv.

Is it too much to ask fr you to stay by my side? Yah I do suck like to the maximum coz of my friggin ugly side. I do admit tht. I don't deny how despondent I'm feeling. Well, too much has happened so far. I'm just waiting to see how much more I can actually swallow.

Right naow, I am waiting to get my ass out of Singapore. I want to leave my troubles behind and enjoy my ass away. Yah and I wanna truly see something.

I wanna have this feeling whenever I am pushing my friends out of my life, I would sense it so tht I can somehow stop it. I wanna have this feeling if my friends are leaving me. So tht I'm able to do something about it.

Today, my mom started screaming at me. After tht, I got back to my sweeping. Thoughts started coming into my brain, than I had a sudden breakdown. I started crying real bad but I had to stopped myself or my family would find out.

Okeh. Sadkid4lyf saying bye (-:

Sorry fr this lousy sad post.

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A smile is just a smile

2010-12-08T08:07:00.001-08:00

When was the last time you saw the whole world smile? It never happened. Because every second, every minute there's someone out there who has a frown on his/her face.

Can happiness actually be bought? Happiness in this world can never be bought. Maybe to some people, money can make them happy. Nothing's wrong with that. But whats true happiness to you? Is true happiness to you by just looking at your loved ones smile and lead a wonderful life while you're out there suffering.

Everyone says 'its ok'. The phrase 'its ok' hides a thousand and one emotions. It actually hides how torn you might actually be feeling.

I'm just exhausted with the world. Its neverending. Truly neverending. Feeling so torn up. That I ran away from everything. That I even lie to people. Just to escape from reality. But true fact, no one can escape reality unless you're dead.

I realize that I'm actually feeling despondent. Feeling lost. Feeling that there's no more glimpse of hope there left for you. Feeling to tired to even think about your problems. Feeling that you're just about to give up on the world.

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The Reason Why ;-

2010-12-07T00:19:00.000-08:00

Hey. I'm gonna kick ass and leave SG in 7-8 days ;-) Yah I'm so eggcited to have fun and get my mind of things as soon as possible. Too many things have happened throughout the holiday. None of them are things that I like to experience. I really really would like to escape frm reality whenever I can. But I can't :-( Sigh. Sadlyf to the maximum.

Today I went fr Tuition. Something good actually came up frm it. I had quite a motivational story session with my tutor. Oh god, it was so eye opening. I almost cried :-| But wtv. The point is don't be complacent and treasure every single thing tht comes to you. Whether its a trouble or a simple paper. Appreciate it and treasure it. Appreciate the fact tht you don't have to be the one having to worry about what adults worry about. Live life and enjoy it! An 8 year old girl is already worrying what adults are suppose to be taking care of. She takes care of the household. You don't do such things. So try to live your life to the fullest ;-)

Bye.

Liar liar pants on fire ;-

2010-12-06T08:21:00.001-08:00

Hey mother chicken bananas ;-) Whuddup yo!

So today I went to do cca fair proposal with pses pluz Vanessa ^-^ Fun fun funny ;-) Ahahha Saboteur was the best okeh :-D

I will not attend fr Thursday thing. Not like I can. So wtv :-|

Hey you out there. I h8 the situation right naow. Whut are we going to do eh?

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Broken trust, broken hearts ;-

2010-12-06T06:55:00.001-08:00

Okeh. Yknow whut. Beach, welcome to the bitter side of life okeh? You don't like it, you go EAT MY FRIGGIN SHIT. Look, when I try my very best to joke or whutever. You give me the I'm-not-interested-attitude. Eh dude. I rather you don't talk to me lah. Whuts so hard in trying to joke with me and have fun? I can very obviously tell who you prioritize first and whut kind of attitude you give people. You specially give a special attitude to certain people. HOI DONT BIAS CAN? Bias a little can lah but not every friggin time. I h8 it so baddddd. You should go suck ballz coz you deserve to. And you should eat my shit. EVERYTHING ALSO KAYPO OTHER PEOPLE LIFE -_-

BYE

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Tell it str8 to me.

2010-12-05T06:57:00.001-08:00

Yo virtual world of blogging ;-)

I fugging am pissed at how some people can make it so obvious tht they're talking about me! Tho I do alot but ugh :-|

Bye

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Please don't go.

2010-12-04T07:52:00.001-08:00

Hey Chicken Bananas out there!!!!! ;-)

So I've been out and about fr the past 3 days. Super exhausting! Been heading towards Orchard with my family. Tiring to the maximum sia. I never got the chance to use my computer at all. Coz I'm either outside or I've to do housework. My whole family doesn't want to cut me some slack okeh. Leave me to do all the bloody housework. Beaches okeh. Ugh. Whutever I'm trying to smile like that ballooon in the photo above.

Hey. I h8 Kpop badly. Like to the friggin core :-| Sorry to the Kpop fans :-| But you gotta accept the Kpop h8rz. Ahahaha Itz kinda annoying to see them being quite unoriginal? Okeh whutever. Enough discrimination. Sorry ah. I don't mean it!!!! ;-)

Hey you out there!!! I've been waiting since forever. Its not happening. I'm crushed to the bones. Why you go breaking my heart a million times :'-(

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I'm not afraid to fall~

2010-12-03T07:16:00.001-08:00

I'm angry yo!

Okeh whutever. I'm done with this shit okeh. You wanna continue this way. Do so. No one is gonna stop you. I'm just waiting fr you to realize who have truly been there fr you. If you were all about fun, tell me right frm the start. Than at least I can hide my ugly sad side. But instead you didn't. Thanks a lot. I realize you keep aqquanting yourself with chicken banana. Great my life is awesomely wonderful having to know this. Thanks a lot beaches. You make it obvious anyway

Bye.

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I swear this I mean it

2010-12-02T07:00:00.001-08:00

I'm simply wasting my life away just staying at home. I mean it 100%
I stay home and do completely nothing but housework eversince my maid flew off home. Sigh sigh. I lead such a sadlyf and a boring one at tht too.

Fml. Bye.

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My kind of perfect ~

2010-11-30T23:02:00.001-08:00

HAI BLOGGER ~ Its been quite sometime eversince I blogged eh. Hahah so how's life fr everyone? Gr8 right? I r happy fr you :-D Why can't my life fr once be gr8? Sadkid4lyf :-( Every F up things happen to me. Total + 100% bullshit okeh. To think my holidays would make it all better. It didn't. Booooo :-( Anyway. Fr the past few days I had SASM, my maid return back to her hometown, birthday celebration and BLAH. Its like 15 days more before I leave. So fast O: But I can't wait to leave actually. Oh well. I'll be going out a lot fr the next 15 days at least. With the pses and Cass Low ^_^ Ahahha.Anyway. HAPPY BIRTHDAY DASHENI JAYA PRAKSONNNN!!!!!! :-D I luv you like to the maximum. Thanks fr always being there fr me. I really appreciate it :-D Enjoy your day dearest ^_^ (hugs) I wish I can post a picture up here. But something wrong with this app eh. Hahaha okeh nevermind. *inserts picture of me and Dasheni* :-DKthxbai.

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Gazillion days : Nothing stays the same

2010-11-25T18:35:00.000-08:00

Boo you ! (-:
I can say my days @ home are super boring :-/ I do nothing but eat and sleep -_- Pig x10000000000. And my parents say I don't eat so much. Crazy retarded x100000000 :-p Tho I didn't gain weight. I is happy for a moment -_- :-D (Y) Whatever. So my boob of a sister got her results yesterday. 220 > Qualify for what school's express ? (-: But anyway, proud of this boob. Some fucktard stole my slippers -_- My only pair of slippers. Yah I'm poor (-: Thank you very much. I h8 how dangerous Pasir Ris has become. First the gangster thing and now stealing stuff. Screw you upside down. Whatever bitch.

Happy Birthday to that sucker below ! (-: Enjoy and I see you tomorrow. Bye.

Nothing stays the same like how we want them to. Ain't that scary ? Looking back at the past, it really brought back all the memories. You can lay in bed at night and start flipping through photos through your electronic device. You'll start remembering the times when you had so much fun just playing and having fun. Laughing and smiling and cracking the lamest jokes you could ever think of. But within all that you could think about, there's actually more to that than it seems. You may be happy at the certain moment with everyone. But behind each smile is a thousand and one problems they may be facing. A smile hides a person's pain. Looking at how things have changed in a snap is really scary. We just can't have what was the past to be now.

Make It Right ~

2010-11-23T23:01:00.000-08:00

Hello.
Omg I'm a total sucker at home okeh. I do nothing. Completely nothing at home -_- I was suppose to go for guides camp but I was sick so I gave that a miss :-( My family has been in a recent spate of accidents :-( Poor family of mine. Hah ! I need to do something seriously. At least before I leave for my trip. I wanna leave now :-( Gonna be going back to school tomorrow to collect my guides cookies -_- Hahah Meeting up with Bontee to bring her to Pasir Ris. Feels retarded :-p Saturday is gonna be a long long day omg :-/ SASM from morning till evening. And at night, I'm gonna have to celebrate my cousin's birthday ^-^
Ain't that sucker below sokute ? (-: He's my cousinnnnnnnnnnnnn who spazzes :-p

Right now I feel nothing.
I can't say I'm happy because I don't feel happy.
I can't say I'm sad because I don't feel sad.
I can't say I'm angry because I don't feel angry.
So I'm numb and I feel nothing.

I feel nothing.

2010-11-19T20:17:00.000-08:00

Boo Onsugar (-:

Today has been one hell of a week. Had Hari Raya Haji (-: I gave camp a missed because I was sick )-: Booooooo. Wanted to go so badly. Hahahahah I went to watch Harry Potter Deathly Hallows. Its hell good ok :D Emma Watson so preedy and skinny. Heh :-P Than while walking towards the cinema this stupid middleage ugly dude went pass me crossing his arms just like I did. And went very cold in malay to me. And my mom was just beside me. Dude -_- You're so pedophile looking. Go flirt with someone your age boob. So I had pizza hut for dinner. I'm turning fat gah )-: I saw Pamela Yeo twice @ Marina Square. Hahahahhah. So coincidental.

Its coming to the end of the month. One month has passed I did nothinggggggggggggggggggg in my holidays. I'm a loser )-: Thats it. I'm going out. I don't care already (-: Hahahahah ^^ Bye.

Thirty Four : I can't do this anymore

2010-11-15T00:05:00.000-08:00

I don't know how to spend my holidays ok. I wake up and slack like a loser at home )-: Its like. I'm lazy to go out. Blehhhh. The outside world is w8ing for me. What am I w8ing for ? Eversince that day, I've been not wanting to go out. Amanda's party was the last outing I had. Eversince that day, I told myself not to go out anymore. But I can't stand being at home. So I take back my words. I want to go out. Bring me out plz )-: Sighhh.

I'm left with no one. Each one left me one by one. Eventhough they told me they won't.

Thirty Three : Who am I to you ?

2010-11-14T00:14:00.000-08:00

Who Am I to you ? You didn't dare to tell it in my face. Whats your problem. I mean look at it this way ok. So what if I'm like that. Everything made me this way. You can't blame me. Anyway. Who are you to keep asking me to stop what I'm doing ? Its my life. Hello, what if you're life is like mine ? What are you gonna do. Stfu about it ? I doubt it. You'll rant about it somewhere right. I swear, first you never considered my feelings. Ugh. And who was there for you when you're down in life ?! I was here for you to help you out in life right. No matter how angry/sad/no mood I can be. I'm still here trying to help you out. And you're down there, asking me to stop and calling me irritating/annoying. Well, haven't you thought to yourself that you did the exact same thing when you're down. Why can't I do the same if you can ? No sense right. I mean look at it this way lah. I never stopped caring for you. And all of a sudden, when I needed you the most. You're gone, vanish from my life. I lost everyone right now. Welcome to my life (-:

Day 31: You think it works that way

2010-11-12T01:25:00.000-08:00

Yo Onsugar. I've started using you now ;-) Its been 2 weeks of school holidays, Am I right ? I as usual do not spend it wisely. Thats so typical of me. I need to either get my butt out of this house or do something productive. Which I did, none D<

Wake up > Get Ready > Breakfast > Watch tv > Starts lying down on my bed > Father nags > Does something > Slack > And BLAH.

I'm a typical NO LIFER. Omg wtf is up with me sia !!!!!!! Er, I gotta go out soon soon soon soon. Someone bring me out plz ;-)

Look at it this way. It takes two hands to clap. If one refuses to help, its useless for the other to do anything. I mean. You broke this. And you're expecting me to pick up the pieces ? Don't take advantage of me. Just becase I'm being very nice to you doesn't mean you come and take advantage of everything. You left this hanging. You expect me to be your dog and pick the pieces up. Hello, if it wasn't clear enough. I wasn't put on this damn earth to be your motherfucking dog. And stop being such a fucking liar. Burn to hell. It doesn't work this way.

Day 28: Fuck you

2010-11-09T08:29:00.000-08:00

I realized. You never wanted this right ? Well, you could've told me right from the start. At least I won't have to care much right ? Well, you chose not to tell me. Its ok. Nevermind.

Can people stop using me like a piece of tissue ? Am I that disposable to you ? You use me than throw me aside. What is that ? What the fuck is that. I mean no doubt I say I'll be there for you when you need me. But it doesn't mean when your problems are solved, you go running away from me and throw me aside and not care about my problems. Well, hello. Who stood by you when you were in your darkest hour ?

Me right ? Well, you're welcome. But when I needed you the most, where were you ? Even if I didn't tell you whats wrong, why won't you just ask. You just let me be. You got tired of my damn dramas. I didn't get tired of yours. Instead I listened to it and try to do everything I can to help you. Even when I'm super exhausted. I still came and help you. Anything just for you. But you did none of that sort.

Instead, you called me... Nevermind lah. Don't even wish to say it. Thanks. I helped you in everything I could possibly do. But you just know how to omg nevermind. I can't be bothered. You're making me wanna h8 you. What is this ? Y are you doing such a thing ? You wanted this all along right ? Bitch, seriously can you plz die. Ugh.

I'm not put on this earth to be at your dispense. Stop using me.

Who I Am ~

2010-11-09T04:34:00.000-08:00

First, Its 12:05 am now. I'd like to wish @Ermanduh Happy Birthday !!! ;-) Ayo, l8 by 5 minutes only. Won't die won't die. Hey, you lousy yellow egoistic emo kia ;-) Ok. You've turned like 14 !!! So cool sia. Old people rock ;-) Anyway, I'm sorry for the fights and troubles I gave you :-( I'm glad we patched up. Yay us ;-) Hope you enjoyed the gr8 day spent with @icancallyoushoe @jenfrans @seowloveswater ;-) Gr8 time blasting music in Best Denki and watching Megamind ^^ Heh.

Basically yesterday. I spend my time having tuition in the morning. Finished at exactly the time I was suppose to meet them -.- So I rushed all the way from Tampines to Harbourfront like mad cow. Sweating like pig sia /: When I reached there, they were all at Food Republic eating. Lol ;-) Than, we went to buy tickets to watch Megaminddddddddddd ;-) Tho I watched it already, but still omg. Hahahah. The movie was oh so fantastic ^^ Than went home after the movie ;-) Omg. My dad is the ultimate joke. I was almost reaching my blok. And than, he went to ask me to go back all the way to Whitesands when I've just been there. Omg joker sia :P

Yknow, thanks for lying to me. Thanks alot. You're such a bitch. Y are you making me want to h8 you so badly ? For what you've done, ugh. I no longer know what to say. Thanks alot ok. I hope you're happy with what you've got.

Day 25: Its over

2010-11-07T20:35:00.000-08:00

Its just the beginning of November and already it sucks. Something happened. I'm all the way to the ground. Nothing's able to save me. I've lost myself. I've lost you. I've lost everything I had. I used to be satisfied with what I had. But now, I lost every single one of them. They either left me or I pushed them out of my life. Something in me changed, something in me made this happen.

I've lost you. You told me 'Let's just be friends'. I mean I'm ok with that. But after all this time, only now you're telling me ? So I've put up with complete pretence for the past Idk how many months. Not your fault. I'm not gonna blame you. I'm sorry for not being there for you all the time. I'm sorry for not spending enough time with you. But I can't help it. We have two separate cliques. We don't hang out much. Tho, I wish I can. You've your own set of problems, I've mine.

I can only do so much to help you out with anything I could possibly do. I spend the last bit of my everything just for you. But I don't see you doing the same to me. You got so many priorities. You don't have a specific #1. You don't have one, but your attitude tells me you do and who you actually prioritise first. I'm sorry to be feeling jealous now. But can you possibly just told me right from the start that, I was never your #1. So that I won't have such hopes and expectations.

Now its all broken to pieces. You lied. You gave me empty promises. You gave me false hopes. I wished you never did. I really wish you never did. I really wish you never did. Why didn't you warn me from the start that I was never your #1 ? Why didn't you do so ! Now, I'm acting so numb towards it. My heart got broken too many times that it can no longer break and that I'm just numb. I want to cry but I can't. I want to be angry but I can't. I want to be sad but I can't. I want to be happy but I can't. I'm emotionless.

Thats what you've done to me. I don't think you feel any pain. Why do you act as tho nothing has happened ? Its like you wanted this all along but you never told me. You put up a pretence. I know you got no intention to hurt me. But still, you should've told me right from the start.

I miss what we used to be. I miss everything. I want it back. Am I able to get it back ?

I`m not gonna lie about this anymore. I break easily. I scar. I`m fragile. I get hurt. I`m not bulletproof, you know.

Day 23: Its too late

2010-11-06T00:34:00.000-07:00

I got hurt. Real bad. Every single time, I trust someone. They use me and played with me like a fucking toy. In the end, I got hurt. I found out things that I shouldn't even be knowing about. What do you take me for ? A fucking toy ? I'm human. Who has feelings. Whose really fragile on the inside. Who got hurt and disappointed way too many times. My heart became numb towards everything that I no longer know how to feel.

I lost myself. I'm just a soul wandering around waiting for someone to save me. But whose gonna do that ? I immerse myself in so much hatred, hurt and pain. And that made me, who I am today. But the question is, Who am I to everyone ? To me, everyone lies in my face. Gives me false hopes. Give me empty promises. So many thousand times thinking that I wouldn't know. But sucker, I know that you've been doing this to me. I just didn't say anything.

Well, I'm not put on this earth to please anyone. I'm not put on this earth to be someone's dog. I'm not put on this earth to be someone's toy. Stop playing with my heart, my feelings and the human. I always appear as the most cheerful girl ever. I'm not cheerful, never was. Thats called acting. I act as tho I'm fine. But on the inside, I'm hurt and crushed to the bones. No one understands.

You say you do but you don't. How do I describe to you how I'm feeling ? I'm not sure myself. I'm like a lost shit in this fucked up world. Everything comes shooting at me at the same time in all different directions that is making me so weak. I'm like a tree branch thats about to snap with all the burdens I'm holding. Its like all you can do is add burdens/problems to me. I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired.

I'm exhausted. Why can't you get the fact that I'm exhausted and I'm using the last bit of my strength and energy for you ? Why can't you appreciate what I'm doing and give me the same treatment ? I really hate the way we communicate. Its like I'm a total bother to you but you choose not to say. How many times have you told me 'Let's start over' and never happened. It got worse everytime.

Everytime I raise my hopes all the way to the heavens, It gets crushed all the way to hell. And than I'll get all discouraged. But than you come along and tell me all those things and do all those things, hopes shoot all the way up. But than when it doesn't happen and when I realized all you said were lies, hopes dropped all the way down to the core and my heart will be crushed till it can't be crushed any longer.

Can't you love me the way I love you ?

Day 22: I need a break

2010-11-05T01:57:00.000-07:00

Hay Bloggerrrrrrrrrr !! :-)
For the past 2 days, I've been having LIT. 10 hours in school. So crazyyyyyyyy omg :P First day was kinda fun. Spend my whole day with @AFFSsays @Leahmoooz and Nut :-))))))) Lol. Second day was so crazyyyyyyyy. 10 freaking hours @ Sentosa. Omg. Spend hours walking. Was supa tired afterwards. Lol, I ate like a damn pig. Omg, And i'm fucking obese now :-(
Happy Deepavali !!! :-)

Mean what you say.
Stop breaking my hopes.
Stop breaking my heart.
Stop lying to me.
Stop giving me those empty promises.
I've suffered enough.
Its time, I need a break.

Day 19: Let's start over

2010-11-02T02:40:00.000-07:00

Hay Bloggerrrrr ^^^^^
I had a great day yesterday (?) Tho my morning was spoilt a little but it was ok. Had LIT in the morning. Boring like hell :-( I came a little l8. Saw Isabel, and Marion Tan didn't want us in the workshop coz we were l8 /: Then she allowed us in. So boringgggggggggg. Lousy pok. Met @Bonteelovevilla in school. Met @Seowloveswater and @Vanslovesyou too :-) All 3 of them, were suppose to hand in the appeal letter. Lol, Marion Tan busy :P

Went to Queensway Shopping Centre with Bianca to meet up with @Chersays and @Jamieeesays :-) To do our guides teeeeeeeeeee ^^^^ Yati so many expectations. Go and die pl0x -.- In the end, this aunty damn nice to us. And gave our tee at $10 :-)))))))))) Yati better be satisfied. Than, me, @chersays @jamieeesays and @supsupoi cab to City square mall. Celebrated @KimberlyKara's birthday ^^^ Had seoul gardennn. So kool :-) Yay. Went home afterwards. Felt so tired that I slept immediately -.- Omg. Pig sia :-(

Went to my Grandmother's house afterwards. Oh hell, every single soul in that house is sick :-( Poor them. I hope they get well soon !! :-) Hm, My baby cousin sokute pl0x ! Omg. He like spasm when my aunt will ask him where's his shoulder. Sokuteeeeeeeeeeeeeee :D Had dinner and went home :-)

Walao. Spend my morning having tuition. Lousy pokkkk :-( Than my dad, asked me about Iphone 4. Went to Whitesands to get it but no stock AGAIN :-( Walaooooooo. But person say somewhere along this week, its coming. Yayyayyay ^^^^^^^^^^

I just feel unwanted. Like no one wants me and no one ever will.

Day 16: I fucking miss you

2010-10-30T05:36:00.000-07:00

Hay Blogger.
Yesterday, Ms Ow gave us all a treat. So I went to school being on the same bus @seowloveswater but both of us were like strangers -.- Lol. Than reached school. 5 idiots were staring at me from the opp bus stop all the way till I reached the school gate. Omg. Was waiting for Ming fei, @vitabooth and @huiqinabc to reach. Lol. Reached and we walked to the bus stop. Than we took 48 to Little India. Went to Gayatri. I saw my uncle :O Ms Ow spent a total of $111.90 on 10 people. Oh hell, so we'll decided to treat her dessert.

Than we went around Little India finding for indian desserts ? Lol. After that, we trained to Dhoby Ghaut. We went to Plaza Sing for a short while to get a drink and eat our desserts. So funny. We talk and laugh like shit with Ms ow :-) Than we took a group photo and dispersed. Went home and got ready to go out for dinner to celebrate my sister's birthday. Lousy Kiddo. Headed to the Airport Swensens to celebrate. Oh hell, I ate like a damn pig. And I felt so obese afterwards. Than headed home and slept like a pig. Tsk.

Today. Woke up. Went for breakfast @ KFC. Oh hell, I deserve the damn Blur Sotong title. My mom said she wanted sugar. And than she asked me to take it, guess what. I took tissue -.- Went back to the table to realize that she wanted sugarrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. So wtf right. I started laughing like crazyyyy. Hah :-) Fetched my sister from her lesson. Than headed towards parkway parade. Was shopping for my trip. Oh hell, damn tiring.

Lunch was yong tau foo. Ugh, it made me have a stomachache /: Walked walked than went to KFC for a drink. Walking pass kfc I saw this psychotic woman scolding someone but there wasn't anyone there :O I think she just came out of the IMH. Ok, I sound mean. Tsk. Went back home and napped :-) Yay. For this past 2 days, I barely slept. Ugh. FML.

Can you stop lying to my face for your fucking pleasure ? Plz tell it to my face bitch.

Day 14 : Wtf

2010-10-28T19:00:00.000-07:00

Hay Blogger.
So last day of school was yesterday. Boo :-( Worse last day of school ever :'-( Had a farewell for Ms Ow in the morning ^^ Aw. Than we cleared up and had to give out forms and blah. And I received the Modal Learner Award (?) Don't deserve it at all. Psh. Thanks Anyway ^^ Than had recess, brought down 100plus. And all of us sat at one corner drinking it :P Went up and it was giving out report book time /: I passed everything except IH and Science. Expected :-( And my passes were like a damn 50 plus. Who would be happy with that shit ?! I got 12th in class. I don't deserve at all plox. Coz of what class I'm in, than thats why my class position like that. Tho, I improved but still :-( Had camp briefing afterwards. Lol. Than went home with Sarah and Stacia.
Gonna meet this mothersuckers l8r at school ^^^^^^ Ms Ow is giving us a treat :D

Last day of school was yesterday, I didn't give anyone a proper goodbye. Sigh. I'm gonna miss all my mothervagina(s) :'-( Thanks for making me smile and laugh even through the pain :'-) Thanks. I love you all loads <3

Day 12: God Knows

2010-10-27T05:40:00.000-07:00

Hay Blogger.
Today Boring but Fun overall :-) Had Touch of Love for the first part of the day. Quite touching eh :'-) We must take care of our elders and everyone around us :-) We may never know what they'll do and how do they actually feel. After that, was free period :-) Listen to Joan they'll talked about Kpop -.- Lol. But whatever, recess than class time. Class time so funny and fun can ^^ Stayed in 2/8 for a while. Than spend the rest of my time with @Chersays @Jamieeesays @Bonteelovevilla @Seowloveswater :-) Designed guides tee and played after that. Went to 2/1 and played sabotuer :-) Hah. Than for the last 15 minutes went back to 2/8. They were playing musical chairs. Crazy people ~ Lol. Tomorrow is gonna be our farewell for Ms Ow. Aw :-( Hah. And collection of report book. Oh hell.

Can you please stop lying in my fucking face ?! Bitch _|_

Day 11: Just kill me

2010-10-24T04:44:00.000-07:00

Hay Blogger.
Monday was another round of checking of scripts. Passed 2, failed 1. I almost failed malay :-( Lucky I pass ah. Than after school, went to macs with @Huiqinabc @Plan_B_Chillax @Ahteewsays @Dimpledsheep and Kiran ^^ Had my Cinammon melts ~~ Than had Island Creamery and MnM's after that :O Pig x100000000000. Than we talk talk talk. I love talking to all of them. They make me feel at ease :-) Went home. Told my parents my results. I got the biggest scolding ever /:

Today.. Boringgggggggggg but overall fun lah :-) Ms Ow announced who retained and who got promoted. I pity those who got retained. Chin up and work harder ok ! :-) I thank god I got promoted. After that, we had to go to the PAS for some health thing. They showed us a documentary about fast food. Disgusting plus there was like sex in that video ? Ew. Than had NYAA briefing and recess. After recess, did a little survey than class time and after school I went to Queens with @Ahteewsays @Plan_B_Chillax @Huiqinabc to do class tee. Finally ordering it :-) Haha. Slow but whatever ~ Bought waffles after that. Nice eh (Y) Than went home :-)

You don't understand me do you ? Do you think its so easy to score so well for this fucking exams ? Let me tell you, it isn't. Why do you always stress me out with all this expectations ? I'm only human. Stop pressing me with all of these. I'm only human. Yes, I disappointed you. But what can I do ? You won't listen to my explanation. You won't even try to understand how I'm feeling. You feel disappointed than what about me ? I feel x10 worse than you. Its my future you're talking about not yours. So you say I don't deserve to be promoted. Ok than. I don't deserve to aspire and dream about Poly. Alright than. Thanks for demoralizing me. Try to be a little more human and understand. And no one is crazy to spend 4 hours at macs eating and talking. Don't believe me ? Than fine. Go fuck your ownself.

Day Eight : I miss you.

2010-10-23T04:36:00.000-07:00

Hay Blogger.
I skipped school on Thursday. Well, not really skip but wasn't feeling well. Same thing :P Spend my whole day out. Visited my grandmother in the hospital. Yesterday was the suckiest day ever :-( We got back our results. Oh hell, passed two failed one (Y) Passed my home ec (Finally) Passed my english. Thank you god :-) Failed IH (Expected) What pisses me off is I failed by 6 marks ok :'-( Mrs Shum not lenient to me. Sad life sad life. Ms Ow told the whole class that 2/8 have people retaining. I'm sure its me. I did so badly :-( I just disappointed both myself and my parents. Sigh. Had CCA after school. Suckiest ever. Today was SCGS playoff. We won first round ^^ But lost second coz the stupid lynette so rough :-( Went to TPY with @Ermanduh afterwards. Changed and headed off to Simei to meet parents. Cut my hair :-)

Memories are only nice when you think back and you start smiling. If you think back too often, however, you will find your heart hurting ‘cause you know that you can never go back to those times.

Day Five : I wish for nothing.

2010-10-20T22:23:00.000-07:00

Hay Blogger. Second day of post exam activity was yesterday. Had hip hop with @Ahteewsays @STACIALEOW @Huiqinabc and Kiran ^^ So funny plus fun :-) Had prefect nomination after that. Stupiddddddddd :P Etch was stupid too :P Lol ~ Paid my stupid library fine after school. St Margs anyhow malign me. No pay = No report book. FML.

Bus-ed home with @Seraspitshere @Ahteewsays @BehindVanessa @Infrontofsarah @AFFsays and Kiran ^^ Lunch > Bathe and went out to the Airport to help my stupid sister with her work. In the end had a serious talk with my dad about streaming. Fucking hell stress :-( I don't want TT. I don't want NITEC. Visited my grandmother after that. Her poor arm swollen like crazy shit :-( And the doctors to operate it now D<>

Kthxbai.

I’m sorry I constantly want to talk to you. I’m sorry when you take long to reply, I get sad. I’m sorry if I say things that might piss you off. I’m sorry if I come off as annoying. I’m sorry if you don’t wanna talk to me as much as I wanna talk to you. I’m sorry if I think about you too much and too often. I’m sorry if I say things I don’t really mean. I’m sorry if I tell you about my pointless drama when you don’t really care. I’m sorry if I come off as being clingy, but its just me missing you.

Day Three: No Effort

2010-10-19T05:02:00.000-07:00

Hay Blogger.
The beginning of my school days are such a bored. Oh goodness.
Had Japanese for post exam. Oh hell, it was so fucking hell boring. Not only was I alone. There wasn't much fun in it anyway. Sigh. Tho, I had Sophia and Adeeba around. But it still felt awkward. Sigh /: Wasted my time. St Margs you wasted my money too. $12 for no fucking reason. Kill me. Whatever. Had assembly afterwards. Some DJ from 987 came to our school. Mr Young. Lol ~ He's such a joker. That was fun. Than sec 2N's had to stay back coz they wanted to talk about streaming. Stress stress stress :-(

Went to Macs with @Dimpledsheep @Jadechen85114 and Kiran for lunch ^^ We kinda figured out that we like scared not enough time. We decided to buy back. I claimed my instant win fillet o fish burger (Y) Lol. Went back to school and had lunch there. Went up for Leadership training afterwards. Oh hell, they wasted my time. Moron Tan couldn't make it so in the end no training. And postponed to Thursday. Wtf. Stayed behind with @Ermanduh for a while before heading home.

MLS/FMFL.

Kthxbai.

Day Two: Nothing

2010-10-18T03:43:00.000-07:00

Hay Blogger :-) @Syafizagleek is right beside me while listening to Superman- Joe Brooks <3
Was such a productive afternoon i had with that nub sister ^^ Tried watching Glee in the morning but failed. Always lag :-(

Than lunch and played WII with @syafizagleek :-) She so louzy at cycling lah. Sore loser :P Than
my dad forced us to go for grocery shopping. HAH. Went to macs for a while. My dad told me such a saddening story :-( My grandmother's in the hospital and having operation. She fell and broke her shoulder. Get well soon :'-(

Got home. Bathe and out again. Send my sister for tuition and went to tampines mall with my dad and @syafizagleek. Dad collected his pants while i got my jeans ^^ Visited Singtel. Iphone 4 out of stock D< Singtel suck ballz for that. I could've changed my phone if it wasn't for the out of stock. God dammit.

Went to macs and off i fetch my sister and now i'm home :-) Tomorrow's school. Siannnnnnnn. I don't want school tomorrow. First, post exam activity so not fun. Than leadership training after school. Even worse.

Kthxbai.